My Soulmates are IDOLS Books 2+3 | 18+ [SoulBond Series]

190:jeans

JieMi

Sorry, was what JieMi wanted to say. Please forgive me, were others. I never meant to hurt you, never wanted this to happen, never wished for this to occur. But the apology stayed lodged in his throat, at the tip of his tongue. Those words were birds without wings, fish without fin, they could never, ever escape his throat. For whenever he got the courage to do it, her eyes would turn him away.

It was guarded steel. There was a glass wall that she had forged without his knowledge, the burn of hurt in her eyes replaced by a steeliness that scared him. It made the words choke in his throat, like the slimy porridge he swallowed that refused to go down, like the blend of the food that he had to swallow to live. It was the only thing he could eat these days. Blended mixtures of everything he had to eat to survive, everything else tasted like ash. And those that didn't tasted like apple pie, heaps and heaps of it. Apple pie, apple sauce, apple juice, apple cream—

"You first? Or me?" she asked, hands on her camera.

Her hair had grown longer, dark curls that seemed soft to the touch, cheeks flushed pink with health. A colour he had never seen on her face in the past. A colour that melted away whenever her eyes graced his frame. But it remained now; she was no longer pallid in his presence. Why? He didn't want to know; he feared the answer to his question.

Oh, how did things go so wrong so quickly? He didn't know how, but it had all crashed and burned into flames with blinks of his eyes. The barrier that he once made to protect himself was infested with thorny roses that stung his fingers.

And he wished that she could guide him, that she could take his hand and lead him in his darkness. And he wished she could let him breathe again, let him relax and just—Just—He couldn't say it even in his head, he didn't deserve to say it. He didn't deserve anything from her, after all the mistakes he had made.

"You take the picture," he answered, afraid of what he would do if he saw that look in her eyes through the camera. The camera was objective, it was mechanical, it was a technical eye that saw things too clearly. It took away the blurred lines, the fog, the delusions and showed the harsh truth of reality. He didn't want to see her eyes in the camera, he was afraid that he would see things he didn't like there.

She nodded, appearing cute and small, lips a rose that he longed to kiss. Eyes the colour of spun sugar on sticks of plastic. "It makes sense, since you're already mostly naked." He sniffed at her words, and the smirk that followed was instinctual. It lighted his mood just a little, erased the memories of Ezra's words, the hostility, the anger, the regret. For a brief moment, JieMi was just JieMi and Amber was just Amber.

"I told you that boudoir photography for school isn't about nudity." He would lose his head if he got to saw her naked, not with the memories of her fresh in his head. Not with the scent of apples in his nose, not with her wet, dripping pussy, a forbidden flower that he could never touch in his line of sight. His cock twitched, eager and wanting, his balls tight with the need for release. He pushed down the urge to shift his package, but he managed to discretely press his thighs over his length, nudging it into a better position. .

"I know, I know," she insisted. "A private room of the model, a voyeuristic undertone. Implied nudity, class and elegance. I get it, so lie down." She patted his bed, looking at him expectantly. His bed because his brothers were asleep in her room; naked and drenched in her scent of sweet, sweet apple pie. It grew sweeter by the day, so much so that his mouth flooded with saliva in her presence and he had to swallow twice to stop from drooling like an idiot. It was an odd sort of need, one that he didn't understand. One that made his cock harden further, one that made him confused.