Lost and found

Chapter 11

Still in flashback

jeonghans POV 

Well that was a complete lie. Joshua's wedding day was the day that I was going to leave Joshua for ever and I wanted to spend one last moment with him alone before I go so when I saw people leave his changing room I dashed in before anyone could see me and Joshua, looked so handsome in that black suit and black bow tie with his hair pushed back making him look smart, he was just stood in the middle of the room, staring at his reflection blankly. As soon as he saw me from the corner of his eye his face lit up with happiness as he walked over to me
"Jeonghan when did you come I didn't see you?" He said back hugging me and pecking my cheek
"I just came right now and what's wrong are you ok?" I said looking at him worriedly
"No I'm not fine I just feel bad" he sighed sitting down on the sofa and making me sit on his lap
"Why?" I asked playing with little stands of his hair trying not to mess it up
"I feel like I'm cheating on you though" he said fisting his hands, tightening the grip that he held on my waist as he pulled me closer
"But your not joshuji and I'm fine don't worry. I don't want you to feel as if you are cheating on me because I'm the one who told you to do this" I said caressing his cheeks and planting a soft kiss on his nose
"This is so frustrating" Joshua sighed defeated as he stared into my eyes hopelessly 
"Yeah but it will all be good in the end" I said trying my absolute hardest to stay positive for him
"Yeah I hope it does" he tries giving me a small smile as I place my hands on his cheek, caressing it lovingly as it may be the last time I would be able to do this
"Anyways enough sad stuff lets move onto the more entertaining things like, did I tell you that you look so hot right now. I'm literally trying so hard not to rip that suit off of you" I teased pushing him down on the sofa as I hover over him
"Oh really now then why don't you-" he didn't get to finish his sentence when we heard someone clear their throat making us both snap our heads towards their direction and to our surprise it was Joshua's parents. I quickly got off Joshua's  body and stood up followed by Joshua who did the same, it was so embarrassing. We were all just staring at each other. Muttering a quick sorry to them all, I quickly made a run for it leaving Joshua with his parents. Once I left the room I could hear Joshua's parents talking to him so I peeked in and I could see Joshua staring at my direction with a bored expression and once he spot me he gave me a deadly glare and smirked scarily making me shudder as I stuck my tongue out at him.
"Jisoo are you even listening" his mum said making him snap his eyes away from me but every now and then he would glance in my direction and I would just make random silly faces at him making his smile but then his parents started to turned around, getting ready to leave, so I blew a quick kiss to Joshua and ran. I made it to the wedding place and sat right at the back next to the door. 

That day I watched the love of my life marry someone else. My amazing, handsome now ex-boyfriend walk in looking as stunning as ever holding hands with the prettiest lady in the world. I watched in tears, silently sobbing as they told their vows. Hearing the priest allowing them to kiss each other, I could not watch any longer. I silently got up and escaped through a fire exit that I had caught sight of when entering. Once I had gotten out I ran, ran like I had never ran before.

I still didn't stop even when the church was out of sight. I ran until my legs couldn't move anymore and then a car stopped next to me and it was a high school friend of mine, Jun and he let me in and made me stay with him. We moved to America and after a while Jihan was born. I didn't like how I was just stuck at home, relying on Jun to pay for the house and other essentials like food and house decor, when discussing it with Jun he suggested that I should try modelling like him and so I decided to try out and thankfully I got the job, they told me I was a natural and had handsome features and hired me instantly. It was a medium sized company, and Jun was close friends with the owner so I did not have to wait long in order to get the job. Throughout these years I haven't had any contact with Joshua or any of my other friends except the ones that are here with me. I've seen how successful he has gotten though and I'm really happy that he is, there still is a part of me that wishes that I was besides him during this.

End of flashback 

Author's POV

"How is Joshua doing though? is he taking care of his health?" Jeonghan couldn't help ask, he needed to know

"are you sure you wanna know han?" seungkwan asked carefully to which jeonghan nodded anxiously, biting his lip 

"He hasn't been the same, in fact he absolutely hates you for leaving him. He says he despises you and wants nothing to do with you. If we mention your name he gets mad and walks out the room and locks his self in his office for hours until one of us begs him to come out. Even though he says he hates you, whenever one of us sneaks into his office there are clues that he is still looking for you and that although he says he hates you and wishes to never see you again there is still a big piece of him that misses you and hopes that you will return one day. His health on the other hand though" seungkwan chuckles sadly "He doesn't eat that much, in fact there are days where he completely starves his self. Every time you see him he is always working, not once has he ever gone anywhere without bringing his work with him. There was that one time where we managed to get him drunk and try getting him to confess what happened between you two but he wont tell us a thing"
Vernon sighs as he holds Seungkwans shaking hands "he likes drowning his self in his work so that he doesn't have time to think about how fucked up his life is and what's worse is that his wife does absolutely nothing about it, she doesn't care about his well being, she's always out with her friends, spending shua's money and he does just lets her"

"I don't know what to do anymore. I mean I miss him so much and it sounds like he has gone through so much hell ever since I have gone but I don't think that me returning back is gonna help any of this, it will only make it worse and beside I don't think that I am ready for Jihan to meet him. I'm a father now remember I have to put his well being on top of mine. My son is my first priority now and I don't think that I want him to deal with this at his age, it's too much for him" Jeonghan let out as his tears cascaded down revealing how drained he was. Seungkwan and Vernon exchanged glances with each other, they had originally thought that Joshua was the only one hurting but it turns out that Jeonghan was hurting just as bad if not more.

"Yeah and he misses you too" Seungkwan said as he felt tears building up in his own eyes and suddenly his phone rang he looked at the called ID and his eyes widened
"Oh no it's Joshua Hyung" he screamed as he started to jump around on the spot
"What" jeonghan yelled startled as his tears dropped onto the floor
"We have been here for so long, we will get going now seungkwan you go outside and talk to him and I'll go get Kwanon" wonwoo said as he knew how much his friend was nervous about Joshua finding him. Seungkwan just nodded and walked out the house wonwoo brought kwanon and Vernon grabbed his hand and was about to leave but then he remembered 

"You guys don't have our phone numbers here let me give it to you all. Now that we have found you again you guys are not getting away from us that easily" he said taking his phone out. He put his and seungkwan a phone number into their phones and left.