Alcohol | Gallagher sister*-discontinued-*

fifteen

I sat in the living room with ian and liam. "Hey fiona." I said to fiona who was in the kitchen. "Yeah?" She said sticking her head in the living room.

I looked to ian nervously. He rubbed my shoulder and nodded at me. "I have to tell you something." I said to her. She sat in front of me on the table and looked at me. There was concern in her eyes.

"Please don't be mad. I'm uh- I'm pregnant." I said the tears flowing down my cheeks. Fiona sighed then nodded. "Do you want to keep it?" She asked. "Of course! I just don't know what to do" I sobbed.

Ian rubbed my back and fiona nodded, "you're gonna have to choose between school and a full time job. Me, lip and ian are not making enough to support another kid." Fiona explained. I sighed and nodded. I stood up and went to my room.

It was a mistake. I didn't mean to get pregnant. He just forgot to pull out. I shouldn't have to choose between my education and getting a job at some fast food joint. If I keep going to school and just work a part time job I can start saving for college and the baby. I am already promised a scholarship for band and music. I can get a better paying job with a bachelors degree then no degree because I'm a high school drop out.

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I sat with topper in the bar. He was drinking some beer but i couldn't drink anything or it would hurt the baby I didn't want to hurt the baby but I needed something. Something satisfying. Something sweet yet tangy at the same time. I needed alcohol.

"Topper. Can I have a drink?" I asked. He looked at me and sighed. "Ivy, you know you can't. You're pregnant now and it will hurt the baby if you drink."

There it was again. It will Hurt the baby.

You know what? Fuck the baby.

I stood up and went to the bar and got a shot. I threw back shots again and again. I then asked for a whiskey and downed three glasses. Topper had grabbed my arms and pulled me back away from the bar. "Ivy no!" He yelled as I cried and thrashed around.

I needed it. I need it.

"Let me go!" I yelled. He dragged ne outside and grabbed snow and put it in my mouth. "Ivy rose, calm down. Its okay. Calm down" he soothed me. After awhile I was calm. We were sitting in the snow just breathing.

"Why did you do that?" He asked. I shrugged. "Ivy, you need to be careful. I don't want you to hurt yourself or the baby."

I nodded and felt my stomach churn. I groaned and leaned over and threw up. "Baby, please stop drinking. For me and the baby. I cant loose another baby." He said.

I looked at him confused. Lose another baby?

"I had a girlfriend before you that forced me into sex. She wouldn't let me p-pull out and I got her pregnant. She wanted to keep it atleast thats what she told me. Then I came home one day to find her all bloody with a hanger and a pair of scissors. She aborted the baby herself." He whimpered.

I brought him into a hug and kissed his head. "I promise I'll stop drinking." I said. He kissed my neck and put a hand on my side. I suddenly felt light headed. "Topper." I said.

He looked up at me. "Yes?" He sniffed. "I-I don't feel so good" I swallowed.

My stomach felt warm and I started to sweat even though it was snowing outside. "Okay can you stand up baby? We can get you home." He said helping me up. My legs wobbled and I held onto topper for support. My vision got blurry and the world around me started to fade.

"Ivy?" I heard topper say. But i couldn't answer.

Then I fell to the floor. I couldn't stand, my heart started pounding. I closed my eyes and fell asleep.