The Outlier

THIRTY (E.C)

What did it feel like to fly? 

Unfortunately, flight wasn't an ability that was promised to me after being turned but I'd like to think I came pretty close to flying. 

Kissing Kai was the closest I had ever come to flight. I'd heard of the expression "falling in love" but this— this felt like soaring; and if I really was falling like the expression suggested, I wouldn't mind at all if it were at the hands of Kai. 

However long I tried to extend it, the indescribable thrill of the thought of flying in love with Kai would always end in a sudden drop of ecstasy and the bestowment of verity. 

I could always hurt her— that much was true. 

I could intend to stroke her cheek, only to pulverise her skull with my fingertips. I could intend to hold her hand, only to accidentally rip her entire arm clean off. 

I remembered the day after I had exposed my family and me to her in the worst way possible. She stood in front of the car— almost expecting to die— not a single expression of worry, anxiety or fear in her eyes. All I saw was a brazen fire in her eyes, looking more prepared than ever to die. 

But I wasn't. 

I was not nearly as composed as she was, though I'm sure my siblings would've loved it if I was. I could hear her heartbeat slowing once the initial shock of seeing a car skidding toward her wore off. 

I ran as fast as I could to her. If exposing my family meant Kai would be safe, then so be it. I was prepared to listen to Rosalie's thoughts, Jasper's scolding and Carlisle's passive disapproval if it guaranteed her safety. 

In the days after the accident, the house was split down the middle with Jasper and Rosalie vehemently insistent upon killing Kai, and although Carlisle remained neutral, it was clear he would've preferred if I kept my head down and minded my own business. 

Alice was ecstatic at the thought that I cared enough for someone to run in front of a van, but it was clear she would've preferred it if I had chosen someone whose future she could see. Esme, as always, showered me in love when she heard news of the accident. 

Emmett showed his support for me through his thoughts. I knew Emmett would've chosen a side in every respect if it hadn't been for Rosalie's apprehension towards Kai. 

I'm sure Jasper would love to sink his teeth into that one, Rosalie thought one too many times. 

I let out a low snarl in response. Jasper will do no such thing!

Yes, of course, I could almost hear the eye-roll in her thoughts, defend the human you've revealed us to. 

I struck up some pathetic excuse at the hospital, and I knew no one bought it. My excuse was going on about how if the blood had spilt, I would not have been able to withhold my thirst. But I knew, better than anyone, I couldn't bring myself to hurt Kai— even if her blood spilt. 

To this day, no one knows Kai knows— and I think Kai and I would prefer to keep things this way. My family can be quite prying, I'd prefer if they didn't stick their noses into the best thing to come out of my void existence. 

No one knows we kissed. Twice. Ah! Even remembering the event elates me beyond words. Kai can kiss me however many times she'd like and I would be eternally grateful. 

I read a text from Kai's cellphone number. The phone she had was far from modern or practical. The sound it made when she— very rarely— beeps the buttons manage to peeve me to unimaginable ends.