bad timing

twenty-one

          Three days. That was how long the three brothers had been sitting restless in the waiting room chairs. Three days of waiting for any sign that Alex would be okay. Three days of knowing their best friend was laying on that hospital bed, her life slipping through her fingertips, and there was nothing they could do about it.

In his twenty-one years of life, Sam had never felt so helpless. He couldn't help but blame himself for all of this. He thought maybe if he hadn't been so horrible to her the past year, maybe they would've been together. Maybe she would've told him about the pains she was getting. Maybe he would've paid closer attention to notice it, and get her the help she needed.

The nurses wouldn't give them much information since they weren't family, even after they explained that she had none. That they were all she had. Their chairs had began molding to their forms as they spent those 72 hours waiting for the news. They hadn't heard anything in nearly a day.

Sam shut his eyes, trying to fight back the frustration he felt. He had never felt such a mix of emotions. Sadness, anxiety, fear, but mostly, anger. He was angry at himself. He was angry at Alex. He wished she had told someone about the pain. Yet again, she had always been like this. One of his first memories was when they were about five years old, jumping on the trampoline when Alex had fallen off. Of course, Sam had rushed to her side, trying to make sure she was okay.

She had played it off like she was fine, that big bright smile on her face as she got back onto the trampoline and continued jumping. It wasn't until the next day, when she showed up at his house with a cast, that he had realized she'd broken her arm when she landed on the ground. She was so quick to dismiss her pain, and go on with her life. When they were younger, Sam was convinced she was invincible for that exact reason. Now, as he sat in the white room with nothing but the memory of her, he realized she wasn't.

Even with his brothers beside him, Sam had never felt so alone. All he could think about was getting to hug her one last time, and tell her he loved her. Although he wasn't religious, he found himself praying that the nurses would make an exception and let him see her. He didn't know whether or not that would make him feel worse, but he felt like he needed to. If she wasn't going to make it, he needed to say goodbye.

He wished he could take all of her pain away, even if it meant he was the one dying. Dying. He couldn't accept that. He had to hold out some amount of hope for her. She always had the highest hopes for him, and she was the single strongest person that he had ever known. He couldn't stop his mind from wandering back in time, back to memories of when they were genuinely happy around each other. Before her parents died, and before they started going back and forth between hating each other's guts, and never being happier together. One specific memory flooded his brain, the time of when they had first kissed during senior year of high school in a game of spin the bottle. 

september 21st, 2019

Sam pulled Alex onto the dance floor, laughing at a joke she had made. The joke hadn't been funny; her jokes never were, but the fact that she had thought it was funny made Sam laugh. "Knock knock jokes haven't been funny in, like, ten years." He grins, making her frown, "Stop being mean or I'm not gonna dance with you." She gives him an angry expression, which only made him laugh harder.

"Oh, you can't stay mad at me." He says, taking both of her hands and dancing horribly through the crowd of people. "I wish I could." She gives him a smile, dancing along with him. He spins her around, even though it was a random Drake song playing. Not exactly a song people twirl around to. As everyone around them danced in a sexual manner, grinding on each other and all, the two of them danced like they were five years old.

Neither of them cared if anyone else judged them. Not if they were making the other laugh, or enjoy themselves. Suddenly, the crowd around them dispersed as one of the guys on the football team began cheering for a game of 'Spin the Bottle'. Sam and Alex exchanged looks, "What is this? Middle school?" Sam yelled, making his friends laugh. "Get in here!" A girl Alex had never been too fond of yelled to Sam. Sam shrugged before finding his way into the circle, pulling Alex along beside him.