Aashiqui 3 -FANFICTION

(9) Guilt

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Before I could say anything.. Aarohi started sobbing and said in a low voice " yes..yes she's right. Rahul....he... d..died because of me. "

"Aarohi stop with this nonsense" I tried to interrupt her messy thoughts.

"No Aarohi bete this isn't your fault. We know. We trust you" said Saigal uncle patting her head"

"If...if I hadn't come to his life, this all wouldn't have happened. Diya is right. I'm.. his murderer" she looked embarrassed avoiding our eyes almost crying.

"Yes. You are" stated Diya with a firm, full of resentment tone.

I bent down and tried to grab her hand but she stood up suddenly and grabbed Aarohi's collar. She started pushing her back and forth saying "I'll kill you bl*** murderer"

Aarohi didn't try to free herself from her grip. She just stayed there.. crying. Her eyes full of guilt.

Saigal uncle and I were successful in parting Diya's hand from Aarohi's neck and I dragged her out of the house harshly.

We came out from the house and I tossed her hand roughly. She looked at me confused without any hint of shame in her eyes.

"What did you just do in there" I yelled at her.
"I did what I ought to" she avoided eye contact.
"No. You did wrong"
"How was I wrong? Don't you also think what Rahul did was due to her?"
"No diya. I never thought like that. Neither I will. Ever. And I have already told you I'll never leave her side."

Diya shook her head with disappointment.

"What happened was...tragic. No one could stop it other than Rahul himself. He was full of negative thoughts. He was depressed. He didn't even talk to me before taking such a huge step. He needed me but I wasn't there. So it's my fault. Not Aarohi's. So for God sake stop blaming her."

"Do you love her?" She asked me all of a sudden. It was quite out of the box. But I was caught red handed. I couldn't answer. Also at that time, I wasn't sure about my feelings towards her.  I just couldn't bear to see her crying. I wanted to be by her side. I wanted to protect her. I didn't know that was.....love.

I ignored her question and told her to leave Mumbai right now. "Diya you should go back now"

"Wouldn't you ask me to stay at your house. C'mom I travelled to so far"

"I don't think its the right time for you to stay. Also I'm not going to return to my house  anytime soon. I'll be staying here for some more time" I replied.

"Ya sure. I'm nothing to you. And that...Aarohi is the most important right!? " she sounded irritated.
"But let me tell you this once more! She Is the cause of his death!" She said with a warning tone. And left for Bangalore.

I came back to reality. Those past memories made my heart heavy. Aarohi still stood there waiting for my answer.

"Yes. Because I didn't tell you before that she's Diya" I looked down, embarrassed.

"Vivek" she put her hands on my shoulders.
"So what if that's Diya?" Her statement stunned me. Did I hear it right? Aarohi said that? For real? I looked at her amused.

"What?" She said with a soft smile. Diya is...not a bad person" I'm just hurt because you kept it a secret from me. We're best friends Vivek. We're not supposed to hide things from each other. Yes I was shocked because....anywayss just know that I Don't have any problem with this marriage okay?" she continued.

"Yes I know. I'm sorry. But I wanted to tell you. I even was going to tell you in some days. I was scared because I thought you'd be hurt." I said with genuine concern.

"Why'd I be hurt? She's not my enemy. And anyway whatever she said was not wrong." she stated with a fake smile.

Both Saigal uncle and I were stunned on her words. We had thought that Aarohi had stopped blaming herself. We thought we made sure to her that it wasn't her fault. But at this moment I realised we were wrong. All these years Aarohi had held herself responsible of Rahul's demise.

No matter how much we console someone, they can't free themselves from the guilt they have inside. Its only them who can resolve the inner fights with themselves. We have to fight with ourselves. We have to free ourselves from negativity. Its no good to hold the guilt inside the heart. It only destroys you bit by bit. 

"Aarohi bete. You're again starting this. We told you we trust you. Its not your fault. "Saigal uncle said with a distressed tone.

I was too shocked to say anything. I just looked at her with disbelief and pity.

"Ok I know. I'm sorry. I just said it unintentionally. I didn't mean it. Just ignore it okay? " She again gave us a fake smile. "Mr. Vivek, just call her and tell her to come here before planned date. We will all go shopping together" she continued with her fake overexcited tone.

I could feel she was happy for our marriage but unhappy for something else. Maybe she went back to those painful memories which she never probably forget. She was reminded of Diya's hurtful words on the mention of her name.  Her laughter sounded fake. Her eyes didn't smile. Yes I knew she was still lost in her past. She still was guilty. She still hasn't forgave herself for three years back. She sang songs but didn't sound like before. She attended functions but didn't speak like before. She smiled at outside but she was crying inside.

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