I want you to keep it (DracoXreader) 18+ smut

Chapter 28- lies and deception

I woke to Dracos fingers dancing through my morning curls. He noticed me stirring from sleep and push my hair off my face with his thumb ticking it gently behind my ear. The smile that crept on to my face before I even opened my eyes said it all "how are you feeling" he groaned in his morning voice that I missed every second of the day "horrible, I think I need to spend the day like this unfortunately" I laughed out refusing to open my eyes, his laugh was deep and vibrated against me.

I knew any moment he'd switch back to the Draco I couldn't stand, the Draco that used me. Mentally, sexually, whatever he pleased. Sliding my eyes open and my hand up his chest I let my fingers meet his face. Needing to touch him. My thumb slipped across his jaw line then I let my fingers cup his face. Applying a small amount of pressure i pulled his head to the side to look down at me. Our eyes were glistening into each other's.

I felt sick to my stomach with happy emotions. Why does that happen? Why does such positive emotions have such negative effects on the body. Like a punishment for being happy. The start of a good thing gives you butterflies so bad you don't wanna talk. Mornings smiling in bed overwhelm you with such fluffy feelings that you wanna throw your guts up. Being in love makes you so sick you can't eat and become skin and bone.
Or was that only me, was I the only witch, person, thing that felt so intensely that it made her body physically ill. Was I that doomed to misery that I couldn't even feel good things with out conciseness.

Draco looked at me like he understood, like he was in my mind wrapped in all my feelings, not making them better or trying to fix them but just accepting them. I couldn't stop myself from laying a hand on his face, then before I knew it I had kissed him. A sweet molten marshmallow kiss, hot but sweet, so sweet you feel sick but you can't get enough.

There was nothing sexual about it. I didn't understand, would I be grasping at these moments of love for the rest of my life with him. Would he always turn his back on me and spit at my affection until it suited him. Would he stay like this forever, was this the breaking point? Would there be more bad days? Too many questions flooded my head, just shut up.

He pulled back from our kiss only enough so he could speak "Don't you have a morning date to get to?" The spite on his tongue scorned my soul, I knew he had a sarcastic grin on his face before I even opened my eyes "you always have to ruin everything" I groaned rolling over carefully touching the floor with my bare feet "well I didn't see Prince Charming nursing you back to Health last night" he was picking a fight with me and I was trying really hard not to let him win.

"Conner is not Prince Charming" I made my way casually to the bathroom acting like what he was saying don't effect me "lucky no one mentioned that half bloods name them" he scoffed loudly from the other room. Peaking my head round the door "what did you just say" I came round a little more to lean my body against the door frame and crossed my arms "he's a half blood, didn't he tell you" he laughed "and you're acting like that's important information why? As if that's gonna stop me from sleeping with him why?! It doesn't fucking matter how muddy or pure someone's blood is. I know for a fact Hermione could put you on your arse any day" I didn't scream at him but I wanted too.

He sat up looking at me confused but serious "what the fuck did you just say?" His voice wasn't poking fun at me anymore, he was speaking like I'd just told him I got the dark mark or something "what that blood status doesn't matter, big news to you I know. Hermione is probably way more powerful then you" he stood from the bed and carmly walked to me, pushing me against the door frame even more.

"You've been sleeping with this guy" his voice was almost a growl, a whisper like he was trying to control himself. I opened my mouth to speak and no words came out, shutting it to swallow my saliva. He roughly grabbed my chin. I didn't really realise what I had said, I thought he was offended that I said Hermione was better so I had no come back for sleeping with Conner, no defensive. I wasn't sure I was ever gonna tell him.