INOTAN ANGST
REQUESTED BY - YourAverage_Simp
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Inosuke HashibaraThat...fucking...NERD!!! Ugh, I hate that Tanjiro prick so much! Always fucking grabbing at me and telling me my work is wrong and trying to fix it and UGH! It takes every ounce of my self esteem not to punch the fucker for all he does, annoying me endlessly day by day! It's not even like we should cross paths that much - he literally sits on the other side of the room from me, and insists on coming over to bother me! It makes no sense, he's got no reason to do so! And whenever I talk to him, he giggles that stupid giggle and smiles that stupid smile like he thinks he's cute! Honestly, I can't even begin to imagine how fucked up he is upstairs, I mean, what kind of shit do you need to go through to have that severe a complex?!
Take now, for instance, where I'm sat on my own, eating my dinner, and he's walking over to me with that smile, a passive aggressive language meaning "I'm better than you and you know it."
"Hey, Inosuke! Mind if I sit here?"
I just grunted, not really acknowledging him at all, instead choosing just to keep eating.
"Oh...uh, Inosuke, you've got a little something..."
His hand touched my face, squidging away a bit of food from my cheek. This was the sort of thing that I hated, the touching. I pushed him off with another grunt, ignoring the confused and offended look in his eyes. What did it matter to me? He should just be keeping his hands to him-fucking-self! Wiping my cheek myself, I ignored him and continued eating in silence, not paying him any more of my attention.
Eventually, he just got up and left, leaving me in peace for a while longer. I don't know what he thought was going to happen when he came to me; I make it no secret that I don't like him, so why does he still insist?! I mean...I guess I see him as a rival of sorts, like an unofficial competition for top spot in the class...and maybe I'm just bitter that he's clearly ahead of me...but I still don't like him!
The rest of the day would turn out to be uneventful, save for...well...basically, another boy in the class - don't know his name, don't care to - had invited everyone in the class over to his dorm to watch a movie, an act of comradeship amongst us all. I accepted, knowing that most wouldn't, and just kinda wanted a change of pace. I knew if I didn't go, I'd just sit in bed on my phone all night, and that was no way to live!
What I hadn't expected, however, was a knock at the door, maybe 30, 35 minutes before the arranged time. Confused, I opened the door, and was met with a familiar, punchable face.
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Tanjiro Kamado"Hey Nezuko, what's up?"
"Just mom asking if you're coming home for Rokuta's birthday next week. I know you're busy, but...you know her, she doesn't really understand "busy""
"Haha, yeah...yes, I will be there! I've got him a little present too, so I gotta be there to see him open it!"
"Cool, I'll let her know then. Any luck with lover boy~?"
"...eh, working on it. Still the same as usual, I guess"
"You've been working on it for three months..."
"These things don't come easily Nezuko! You'll understand whe-"
"When I'm older, yeah, got it. Bye Tanjiro!"
"See ya next week, sis!
Hanging up the phone, I threw it onto my bed and smiled to myself. She just had to mention 'lover boy', huh! To tell the truth, Inosuke had always...I dunno, fascinated me. He was just so abnormally pretty that I felt like I couldn't help it but to stare, and help him, and touch him...a bit weird, but I've always tried to be tactful.
The reason it feels most weird is that his reactions are hard to gauge. Sometimes he shrugs me off, sometimes he just lets me do it. Sometimes he talks to me, sometimes he doesn't. He's so inconsistent in his mannerisms that figuring out whether this feeling is reciprocal is practically impossible.
And that's why, half an hour before I'm scheduled to be watching a movie with Tanaka-kun and everyone else, I decide to just go for it. Nezuko was right; I had been saying for months that I was making slow progress, but that was all fabricated. In reality, I'd been biding my time to try and figure Inosuke out, but hadn't managed to. Hence, my current scenario - thinking "screw it" and walking out of my door, a couple sprays of cologne before I left, just in case.
I don't...quite know what I expected from this. He was just so mysterious, so hard to read that it got to the point where I was ready to just take a gamble, thinking I was able to handle the consequences. Thus, I knocked on Inosuke's door, a smile on my face as it clicked slowly open.
He seemed...a bit miffed, but I still pressed on with the original plan, too stubborn to back down now.
"Hey Inosuke...umm...mind if I talk to you for a second"
"...whatever, make it quick"
"Sure, sure. Can I...?"
I trailed off, pointing past him, and he wordlessly walked away, so I took that as a yes. Closing the door behind me, I followed him as he sat on his bed, leaning against his desk.
"Listen, Inosuke...um...I don't...know quite what I'm trying to say here...I guess what I mean is-"
"Spit it out, I don't have all day!"
"...you know what...I'll show you"
"You'll show me? What do you m-"
I cut him off, my lips connecting briefly with his. It was like bliss, euphoria as everything I'd ever wanted fell into place.
...and then toppled over.
Two firm hands on my chest shoved me away, a disgusted look staring back at me. He wiped at his lips with his hands and glared at me with eyes that could kill.
"What the fuck?! No! No no no, we are not like that! I don't know what kind of shit you think about, but you've got that all wrong! And you need to leave. Now."
"B-but, please, let me expl-"
"No need. Go!"
"Inosuke, pl-"
"GO!!!"
"...NO! I won't go! Because it won't help with this outcome!"
"Look, I'm going to spell it out. I don't like you like that! In fact, I don't like you at all! I never have, and I never will. Now get the FUCK out of my dorm!"
"..."
I stayed silent, just standing there for a few more seconds, absorbing the reality of what he'd said. It was all made up. I'd convinced myself that he had feelings for me, and now I was the fool.
I trudged out of his dorm without another word, looking at the floor in case it might offer me some sympathy. I went back to my own dorm and stared at the ceiling, just waiting and waiting for some divine intervention.
It would never come, and I would end up sat at the back of a gaggle of my classmates, silently watching the movie to distract myself. Inosuke had never turned up, which didn't really surprise me all that much.
In fact, that day would be the last time I ever properly spoke to him. I stopped bothering him at lunchtimes, or helping him with his work. If we passed in a corridor, the both of us stared straight ahead, no concern for the other. Maybe it turned out better in the end - who could say? I'd only have been heartbroken anyway, and it was better to get it out of the way.
I'm not proud of what happened in there, but it did, so that's the end of it. I still catch myself thinking or dreaming about him every now and then, but it's much less frequent. We were better off as strangers, null to the others' existence.
That way, we couldn't hurt each other anymore
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Oof, the FEELS!I know this is quite short, but I sort of wanted it to be like a representation of how Tanjiro's feelings were cut short
^ look at me, talking as if I know what I'm doing here 🙄
Hope you enjoyed!!
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