The Chaos Squad

Movie night pt3

Still Wade POV

I was happy. No one else was. That seems to be a normal occurrence. Whatever. This is a crackfic. We're supposed to do stupid stuff.

Some of the first people to step inside were the spies, because the author loves angst. Natasha, her sister Yelena, Clint, the newbie Kate, Fury, Maria Hill, and--

"PHIL?!"

Agent Coulson waved, "Surprise?"

I first pumped, "Totally called it!"

Spider-Man turned to look at me and I'm pretty sure he was glaring. I can't really tell with the mask. Everyone started asking questions and Fury held up a hand to get them to shut up.

"Coulson survived with immediate medical care. I pretended he didn't so you would all unite over his death. You're the Avengers, so you avenged him."

'Ekko' made himself smaller to hide behind Bruce and Bucky. The spies obviously noticed anyway.

"What the hell's that?"

Natasha elbowed Clint in the ribs hard. Ekko was staring intently at Bruce, who looked a little embarrassed.

"Okay, let's wait for everyone to come before we do introductions," Pepper spoke as more people entered the room.

Hope aka angry wasp lady was followed by a cute little girl I'm pretty sure is Scott's daughter Cassie. 

"Is that everyone--" I was cut off because, hey, the author doesn't really like me.

"WHAT'S UP, PARTY PEOPLE!"

Two familiar people came in, followed by two unfamiliar people.

So many people to meet. So many people to piss off.

"Who are these weirdos?" Tony asked.

"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me," Ekko muttered.

"Oh," Dr. Strange said, arms crossed, "So he wasn't lying."

Spidey, the oblivious cinnamon roll, bounded up to the new people. "Hi, Dr. Strange! Hi, Mr. Wong! Hi, new people! What's your name?"

The newbies, a young man and woman, looked at eachother and grinned.

"I'm Shang-Chi, this is Katy."

YO, IT'S SHANG-CHI! FINALLY THE AUTHOR ADDED THEM! YAY!!!

"Hi, Mr. Shang and Mrs. Katy!" Spider-Man said.

"Mrs--" Katy choked, "Oh-- NO! We're not--"

"Definitely not-- No--" Shang stammered.

I cackled, "Just a friend, right, Simu-- Shang?"

He gave me a weird look but everyone's attention was averted to Ekko and Dr. Strange having an angry staring contest. Everyone fell silent as they watched the two magic people, with Ekko's eyes literally glowing red and Strange's sparkling orange. Strange suddenly flinched and Ekko grinned wickedly.

"And don't ever try to mess with my memories again," he hissed, sitting back down next to Bruce.

"As entertaining as that was," Tony spoke up, "Let's do introductions before we split up and stuff."

"Okay, people!" Spider-Man jumped up on the table, "Over there, we've got our original spies, Mr. Fury, Agent Hill, Agent Coulson, Black Widow, and Hawkeye. Then we've got the other original Avengers, Dr. Banner, Captain Rogers, and Mr. Stark. Thor's in New Asgard, but if you wave I bet Mr. Heim-something will see you and tell him you said hi. Now, we've got some newer people here. Ms. Widow's sister, Yelena and Mr. Hawkeye's mentee Kate. We've also got Dr. Strange and Mr. Wong-- oh Mr. Wong left. Anyway! There's Mr. Wilson and Sergeant Barnes. We've also got Shang-Chi and Katy. There's Mrs. Van Dyne and Mr. Lang, with their daughter Cassie. And there's Deadpool and Shuri and Ekko. And I'm Spider-Man. Any questions?"

Clint raised his hand, "What's with the blueberry?"

Natasha and Kate both elbowed him again and he doubled over in pain.

"I'm done," Ekko said, and walked towards the door. Again, he was dragged back to the couch by Bruce and Bucky.

"If you're gonna disrespect our aliens, please leave the vicinity," I said, crossing my arms.

Clint put his hand up in surrender, "Fine."

"Frost giant. Came with Thor to earth. When may I leave?" Loki asked.

"Never," Spider-Man said, "Now, it's movie night. Now, whoever wants to stay, please sit on the couch. Whoever wants to watch something rated R, please go with Mr. Stark to the other room."

Cyclops, Not-Mountain, Scary Spider, Mr. Pigeon, Angry Green Bean, Chicken Wings, Truth-Justice-and-Spangles, Sparkle Fingers, and Mrs. Buzz all went to the chamber of adult movies while the rest of us began sitting down in the living room.

(lol 666 words)

So the rest of us were piled onto the couches and the ground. Spidey made himself a web hammock, I was curled up with Shuri of all people on a loveseat, Ekko was draped over the back of the big couch in a weird way, Shang and Katie were snuggling to the side in a totally platonic way, Kate and Yelena were laying on the floor, Scott was sitting with Cassie on his lap, Bucky was sitting cross legged on the floor, and Phil sat on a chair with an impossibly big popcorn.

"Now, what movie?"

"Frozen!"

"The Greatest Showman!"

"Empire Strikes Back!"

"Goblet of Fire!"

"Tick tick boom!"

"Them!"

"Lilo and Stitch!"

"Okay!" Spidey yelled, "I'm turning on WALL-E."

Everyone seemed happy with that, so it began and the music began playing,"Out there... there's a world outside of yonder..."

But the peace wouldn't last. Why? Because the author is evil and this is a crackfic...

And I can't wait.

~~~

I hate you Wade.

I love WALL-E, so shut up.

Anyways, hope you all enjoyed.

These chapters keep getting shorter. I blame Wade.

BAIIIII