Life's short write it down

Stop

I need to be put on a leash and not in a sexy way. I did something completely stupid. I bought blades and I'm triggered but hear me out I have a plan and this time it will work so I took all the blades out and if I'm feeling instead of cutting myself I've made a contraption with my special effects skills made or attempt to make a thing to cut which will resemble my skin like wrist or thigh depending on what I do but like yeah I'll make it every time Im sad so two benefits one practice on my special effects skills and to have a way to put my anger out in a non harmful way I'll cut the thing and hopefully fake blood with come out and maybe some ill make wounds with the blades and photograph them yay idk I like gore and if I can make the gore that's even more cool.like I said I'm insane but I'm not harmful to others I don't enjoy giving others pain. Just had to put that out there. And after each blade I use in the back of the dispenser there's a place for used blades yay. I would try to do my last plan like limit my cutting but I promise d no self harm and anyway this is better I hope it works