Life's short write it down

Confessions

I think in like fifth grade I made new friends and one was kinda a bully but she got bullied all the time so her attitude was just strong she had to put up a shield to not get hurt by others. I would be the kid to stand up for others but no one else has ever stood up for me never in my life. When I started to like boys I would be a stalker kind of crush which was so creepy I admit but not anymore. My other friend would abuse me I didn't know better I just wanted friends she would touch me and say it's normal and that Girls could do that. What I didn't know was that she was taking advantage of me and It makes me sad to think people are like that. That lasted for two years straight that's when I was getting depressed allot I would go to the bathroom and try to commit suicide I've attempted to commit suicide at least 30 times I say on my secret Instagram account 6 but it's not true I've tried to hang myself ,take pills ,slit my wrist, suffocation, drowning and even and I hate admitting this i even tried to shoot myself usually girls aren't messy when they commit but I tried everything that I could think of when I 12. The only one I went through with was the pills and I got hospitalized the others I couldn't go through with because I wanted to die but couldn't actually bring myself to do it.