Life and other shit in general

Unspoken words

Vera's POV: ugh my head. Feels like I've been beaten with a sledgehammer. Or hit by a car...wait what. There's a hairy mans chest underneath me... Do I dare to look and see who? It's Ethan?!?? Nooooo no please no he's Lily's brother! I'm in his clothes. Oh my god I'm a hore. I'm a hore with my best friends brother!?
Ring ring ring ring ring
Ahh it's probably lily to tell me never talk to her again cause I'm a slut bag.
No it's Harry. OH MY GOD!!! Everything comes rushing back. Last nights events. The kiss. The argument. Ethan rescuing me. Think I may die of shame. Can't talk to him just yet, don't think I can talk to him ever again. I mean I kissed him and would have let him do more if I'm honest. Then disappear? Probably thinks I'm crazy. Il text him.
'Hey Harry so sorry about last night something came up I had to leave x'

'Its ok lily said she was talking to you, you had us all worried for a bit we was guna call the Feds at one point lol so we still on for today? 🙈I know your probably hanging but i wana see you 😊xx'

Oh fuck! Forgot today was our official first date 😳 I still gotta get home and get ready.

'Yeah sure! Just gimme a couple of hours to find some food source and a shower 😂 x'

'Lmao 😂 I've gotta try sort out a clean up job for last night so it's all good il ring you in a bit then wel catch a late film xx'

Oh I pity him. The house was in a bad state before I left so I can imagine the state of it this morning..

'Ok in a bit Harry x'

Curse iPhones !!! The sounds they make are too loud. Ethan's waking up. This is guna be awkward. He's in boxers and I'm not in much more. Fuck Vera fuck how do you get into these situations? He stretches his arms and opens his eyes. He really does have the nicest shade of blue. It's nearly grey. "Morning V, you k?". Shit I'm staring. What's wrong with me it's Ethan! He's got a concerned look on his face. Oh god I made an ass of my self last night. He was so sweet he even carried me in. "Yeah just banging headache...Ethan I'm so sorry about last night. I know how much hassle I am, thank you again. Il call a cab". I go to get outa bed and he pulls me back in and sits up. He looks pissed. "Vera are you stupid? I told you last night this is what friends are for. It wasn't hassle you needed help so I helped. If I'm honest I was glad you called. Come on it's early still wel get breakfast and il drop you home. And stop apologising seriously!". I don't know what to say. I mean me and Ethan have only spent time together with one of our siblings. This feels weird. But nice. Ethan has the whole I'm guna look after you and protect you feel. I thought Alfie was like that. Just goes show I was wrong. "Ok since you asked so nicely".

My god I've never had so many miss calls and text messages in my life! Loads from the girls. Dolly's text me 'hey babe dono what happend to u last nite listen anyways u left ur keys at mine I've got work in a bit 😩 so Im guna drop them to urs yeah? Il leave them under the mat, luv ya il ring u later for the goss xxx'
HE musta rang me 40 times. What does HE want?? Thought he was too fucking busy. He's text me. At 3 o'clock this morning. 'Im sorry cheeks'. That's it? That's all you have to say. Yano what fuck you and fuck your sorry stick it where the sun don't shine! Prick. Ethans mum, Joshua and Ellie were already gone when we got up. Think there gone to Joshua's parents. Ethan's chatting away like nothing's weird but it is weird. When we got outta bed he was really quiet. And took a very long shower. I have never woken up with a boy like that. The only boys that sleep in my bed are George and Alfie. We usually top and tail. It was kinda nice though. Waking up with arms around you. Feeling someone breathing underneath you. Ugh this is Lily's brother Vera! Stop you animal. Anything will do me lately. I'm guna blame it on my hormones. I am a natural slut that's trying to fight it. Never been so hungry in my life. Ethan's cooking is actually really good? I'm shocked. "Wow Ethan didn't think you could cook?" He's blushing. Damn thought I had him worked out but between last night and this morning I'm seriously confused. "Um yeah I like to cook sometimes. When I was younger I wanted to be a chef". "So why don't you now? Your really good honestly it's not me being polite, if it tasted like shit I would let you know trust!". He looks down at his hands. Never seen Ethan like this?? Modest, shy.. Just ain't him? "Um dad didn't think it would make a good profession for a man.." Oh right. Lily told me about their dad. What a prick. He's an alcoholic, used to beat their mum as well arsehole. Eventually she threw him out about 3 years ago. He hasn't bothered with them since the day he left. Hate men like that? Why bring a child into this world if you can't be selfless enough to love them whole heartedly. "What a dick Ethan I'm sorry I know he's your father but what a sexist cunt!". "Hey you got something against sexist men" He's laughing now. I like when Ethan's playful. It's normal, a brooding eth is weird. I'm so grateful to him for last night. Every time I think of how foolish if been I get a shiver down my spine. Anything could have happened. I don't think I just catch his hand and squeeze. He's head snaps up. He's eyes are hooded. What's that emotion on his face? Anger? Tired? ..Lust? No obviously not lust. God Vera what makes you assume every man wants you. Braces and fussy hair. Yup every mans dream.
He gives me a gentle squeeze and pulls his hand away. Think it's home time for me. This is too surreal. "Um Ethan you ready to drop me home?" He jumps up. Wow he's really on edge today. Probably has some girl coming round or something knowing him. "Yup sure lets go".

Alfie's POV: I'm so nervous. What is she guna say. What is she guna do. Il take it. Il take anything from her. I've been starved of her. Feel like it's been years since I stayed in hers. Then Harry fucked it all up. No alf you fucked it up. Shut up!! Swear that little voice in the back of my head need to fuck right off. Feel like a dick. Sitting on the wall outside hers. That old woman from next door is staring at me. What do want?? Seriously why you staring?! She's a horrible old bag.
Where are you V?? There's no one in. What if something happened to her last night... No she's ok, Si said lily was talking to her but she don't know where she went. Il sit here all day if I have to. Angie or George will have to come back at some point even if she don't.
What. The. Fuck. A car pulls up in front of me. With Vera in the passenger seat. And Ethan in the drivers. She's in last nights clothes..Why is she with Ethan??!? Lily stayed in Simons. Why would she be with Lily's older brother but no lily? I know enough about Ethan. He likes girls. A lot. She looks pissed like really pissed. Think their arguing? They jump out. "Look cheeks I know I'm the last person you wana see but just hear me ou.."
"You to fucking right she don't wana see your ugly mug!! Who the fuck do you think you are Flanders you little cunt?!! You left her walk the roads last night you prick anything could have happened to her you dumb fuck!!" Shit. She told Ethan. He musta came and got her. Why ethan? Is there something I missed? "Look Ethan I know mate your 100% right I'm trying to apologise to her now if you'd calm down"
"Calm down?? Calm down?? You little bastard I'm guna knock you spark out!" He goes to pull his fist back. I jump up. I won't hit him back he's right. But I'm not guna sit there and let him batter me. I open my hands up to show I'm not looking for fight. Vera jumps in between us. "Eth! No please stop. Please he's not even worth a slap just leave it". Wow. That hurt worse than any slap I would have received. She should let him hit me. I deserve it. "Ugh ok Vera but you ring me if he don't fuck off and il come straight back ok? And you Flanders fuck off and stay away from her you hear me your bad news you wanker". I know. But I can't. I'm a selfish bastard I can't stay away from her. He jumps in his car and pulls away. She turns slowly. She looks me straight in the eye. She looks disgusted. I wouldn't blame her to hate me. I can't do it. I can't hold her gaze. I look down at my shoes. Owwww! Fuck owwww. She's just slapped me across the cheek. That is stinging. Badly. "That is for being a horrible bastard. Now leave me alone Alfie. Go away and leave me be".
The whole world just span. My stomach drops. "No v please I'm so sorry just let me explain I know what I said was wrong I'm sorr.." She's gone. She just walked straight in home and didn't even look back. She left me. Again. my heart feels like it's guna bust. 'Go away and leave me be...'
She doesn't want me. She despises me. And I did it. I ruined everything. I can't help myself. I run. I run to the alley beside her house and I do what any self respecting man would do. I cry my eyes out. This is starting to become a habit. Can't take it. She don't want me. She won't even talk to me. Think I'm guna pass out from the pain in my chest. Breathing is difficult at this stage. My cheek is burning from the slap. I'd take another 100 of those to take back last night. I'd do anything to change what's happened. I've fucked it all up. Can't stop crying. Im going mad. I pulls clumps of my hair, I need to get control of myself. But I can't. I feel hollow. Empty. I need her.
Vera.
My Vera.