Focus

Out Of The Frying Pan, Into The Fire

I must have slept for a while on the ferris wheel, because I can feel Calum gently shaking me awake. My eyes open into complete darkness. Kiss, is my first thought. The taste of his lips comes flooding back to me and my heart soars. I rub the sleep out of my eyes and turn to face him, finding that my legs are stiff from sitting so long. I wince. "You're beautiful," he says softly into my ear, and starts trailing kisses along my neck. My face burns hot. I don't think I'll ever reach a point where I'll get accustomed to feeling Calum's lips on me, but I enjoy it immensely, and I let him know by letting out a little sigh. He grins into my collarbone. His soft hair is tickling my ear. "We should - probably - leave - you know," he says between kisses. The bottom of my stomach burns with lust. He's turning me on, and my inner diva is going insane, but I have to keep my calm. My usual palm pinching technique works after a few tries. He reaches my shoulders and then stops, pulling his face up into mine. "You're incredible," he growls. I swallow. The night air washes over my face, and my back is sore from slumping against him in the hard plastic seat. Suddenly, I sit up, worried. "What time is it?" He checks his phone. "3:29," he says.

I smack my forehead. "Sarah is gonna be so mad at me," I groan, scrambling to get up. Calum pulls himself out of the seat and follows me. The girl operating the ride has long since left, which I'm not sure is legal, but there's really nobody around to enforce the rules right now. I climb weakly into the passenger's seat of his car, rubbing my temples. He slides in and starts the ignition. Once we're out of the parking lot, I don't have to wait long for him to speak. "Hannah?" He says gently. "Hmm," I answer, still weighed down by sleep. He takes a deep breath. "Do you need anything from me?" I furrow my eyebrows, confused. "What do you mean?" He sighs, obviously frustrated, and at a loss for words. I can almost hear him struggling to speak. "Do you need me to do anything about Brandon?" His voice is poisonous. My eyes widen as I begin to remember everything thats happened over the past few days.

Yes! My conscience screams at me. Tell him what you told Sarah! Tell him you don't feel safe! But it's not as simple as that. I feel like if I open my mouth, I'll start crying and I won't be able to stop. I can't do that. I've allowed myself to overindulge in self pity this year. Granted, a lot of things have happened, but I can't start crying at the mention of Brandon's name. I have to rise above all this. When I try to speak, my voice catches, so I cough a few times, and then say in a small voice, "I don't want anything but you. You, Calum Hood, as yourself. You as you really are." "Dont say shit like that," he snaps. "I'm serious. That asshole hurt you. Do I need to do anything, or will you be okay?" I lean back in my seat slightly. It's never pleasant when he gets annoyed like this. I don't know what to expect. "I'm just saying," I begin quietly, "that I've already dealt with it. Everything is gonna be fine."

I sound like I'm trying to convince myself as well as him, but hopefully if I say it enough, I'll start to believe it. He shoots me a grateful smile through the darkness. "Let me know if anything changes," he warns. I nod and smile back, and although my eyelids droop with exhaustion, I fight to stay awake. "I meant what I said, you know." My words break the silence. He raises an eyebrow. "Oh? About what?" I look down at my hands. He's just trying to get me to say it again, I think. But I don't care. "What I said about loving you." He smirks slightly. I'm not really sure what I expected from bringing this up, but I wait for an answer. "I can't say it back just yet. There's a few things I have to make sure of first." I drum my fingers on the armrest. Moonlight shines in pale strips through the window, illuminating my fingers in odd patterns. By now, I've gotten accustomed to his double speak, so I sound almost bored when I ask, "Like what?" He snorts. "For starters, I have to make sure no one is going to follow us again."

I have to process the words about four times before it finally sinks in. He gave me a real answer! My conscience stands in a cheerleader costume waving her pom poms triumphantly. I can't help but grin. "Yeah, that's probably a good idea," I say, hiding a laugh. Maybe if I act skeptical, his thirst to prove himself will take over and he'll accidentally let slip some answers. He sighs. "Michael told you about my old job, huh?" His eyes are trained on the road but I can tell that his full concentration is focused on me. "Kind of," I say. "He told me you and that girl were in a business together." Calum nods slowly. "It was a pretty high salary job," he explains. "I only did it to help look after Mali after our parents...left." He grips the steering wheel and I can see his knuckles turn white with anger. He shakes his head slightly, and continues. "I was one of her best employees. Indisposable. But, uh, things changed, and it became too much to deal with, so I tried to quit. She can't handle it, I guess. She'll do anything to get me back, including following me."