dreamt thoughts

to dad

i just realised
it's like a cycle
like deja vu.
you don't get it,
do you?
you don't get how hard it hits me in the chest.
you don't get how hard the tears flow down my cheeks at night when i'm thinking about it.
you don't get how my heart clenches and sinks when you texts me the words
'i'm sorry babe...'
you don't get that it's like a cycle
you did it to him now you're doing it to me
why?
i didn't do anything to deserve it.