MASHAWN POV
While on the flight back to Saint Louis, I took the time to look up my dad and found that he had become CEO of Boeing and had done well for himself since he left us. I was also able to get his address and contact information. In all the pictures of him I saw, he had a big ole smile and had the look of a good guy when really he could be considered the devil himself.
As soon as I got off the plane, I was met by a swarm of fans and admirers asking for autographs, even though I normally liked the attention today, I wasn't really feeling it I just wanted to get this trip over with. When I finally made it outside I stepped into the first taxi I saw and was finally on my way. "Where to?" the cabby asked looking at me through the mirror.
"Uhh" I pulled out my phone and read the address on the screen "4109 Sheridan Meadows."
"Alright." the cabby nodded and turned on the meter. I looked out the window and was reminded of all the sites in Saint Louis and the diversity of the city. As I passed by my old hangouts, I reminisced of the times there, some good and others bad. I missed the city. "Hey you look kind of familiar, have I met you before?" he asked.
"Nahh I doubt it." I answered quickly hoping he didn't suddenly recognize me.
"You sure son, what's your name?" he asked as he turned down the street my dad stay on.
"Mark." I lied.
"Well I guess I don't know you." he said after some thought and then finally pulled up to a large house on the end of the long narrow street. I glanced at the meter and saw the price was $30.76, but I just handed him a hundred dollar bill and asked if he could wait for me and he obliged.
I knocked on the door half expecting no one would answer and as I prepared to walk back to the cab, a short light skin older woman with her jet black hair in a bob answered the door." Hello, how can I help you?"
"I'm sorry I was looking for Isaac Monroe, but I guess I have the address I"ll be g-"
"Oh no son you got the right place. You must be here to get a job application. He's in the basement." she exclaimed as she allowed me in. I thanked her and began walking towards the basement.
"No Walter let me explain something to you! If we don't meet quota by the 10th you're not gonna have a job so I suggest tha-" I heard a man yell as I walked into the office. The man was my complexion, bald with a black mustache and goatee, tall and a slim build, and eyes that completely resembled mine. He didn't look much different the since the last time I saw him. After I had fully entered the room, I could feel him staring at me as intensely as I was staring at him. "Walter I have to call you back." he said as he dropped his phone on the desk and sat in his large leather chair.
We sat in silence for a long time till he finally said "Mashawn, this is completely unexpected." I still said nothing because I still didn't know what to say to the man that I hated more than anyone.
"You know, when I came here I expected you to be half dead in some hospital, lonely, hurting, hated by everyone, but instead you're a CEO with a beautiful wife who will probably do anything for you. Damn, Karma must have given you a get outta jail free card." I finally exclaim.
"You're right I'm not in a hospital bed clinging to air, I'm doing better than I ever have. I see you are too with winning the Super Bowl and all, I'm guessing you just came here for your image" he chuckled "probably taping you on ESPN right now talking about Mashawn Monroe going back to his roots, visiting his father who he hasn't seen in 20 years hoping to get him something to make his daddy love him."
"Nahh it's nothing like that, honestly I don't even wanna be here."
"Then why are you here Shawn?"
"I need to talk to you."
"About what?" he asked with a sense of agitation in his voice. I said nothing, but instead stared at him trying to keep my composure. "I'm sorry bout what happened to your mama and them. When I heard about it, it almost broke my heart." he apologized.
"It's funny how you say that you sorry and how it almost broke your heart, but you weren't at the funeral." I retorted with a fake chuckle.
"Why would I be at the funeral?" he asked as if he was surprised that I would ask him such a question. I could no longer hold everything in.
"BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH YOU LEFT US THAT WAS YOUR FAMILY! AND FAMILY IS SUPPOSED TO BE THERE, EVEN THOUGH YOU HURT US YOU SHOULDN'T OF JUST ABANDONED US LIKE THAT! WE NEEDED YOU TO PROTECT US, BUT INSTEAD YOU HURT AND RAN AWAY FROM YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES AND FOR WHAT?! A BULLSHIT JOB AND A CORNER OFFICE?!" I asked angrily as I got up from my seat and threw the chair across the room.
He didn't say anything at first, but just watched me till he said, "So that's why you hate me so much. Not cause I left, or cause I used to beat on y'all, it's cause you know that you just like me." he chuckled as he got up from his seat and walked over to me. "Now what you gone do, hit me? Throw some more shit? Cry? What good is any of that gone do Shawn? Cause at the end of the day, I'm always gone be your father." he said matter-of-factly.
"You're not my father, you're the devil." I replied as I turned my back to him.
"And what does that make you?" he asked with an evil smirk on his face. I was silent again because he was right about everything. I was just like him, and that's what I hated the most. I couldn't be like him, I couldn't be the one to hurt everybody like he was. "Look, you wanna talk man to man we can, I'll be completely honest with you from this point on cause THIS WILL be the last time we speak to each other."
"Why did you leave?" I asked still facing away from him.
"Cause I knew that if I would have stayed, I would have kept drinking, smoking, and hurting people."
"Did you even love us?"
"No." he answered honestly. I began to survey the office to think of what to ask next or if I even wanted to ask anythig else. I was able to find a picture of this little girl, my dad, and the woman who opened the door.
"Does your new family even know about us?"
"No, that's a part of my life I wish to forget." I took a deep breath and clenched my jaw.
"You love her?" I asked raising the picture to him. He looked at the picture and a large smile spread across his face.
"More than anything in the whole wide world. That's my little girl Jasmine." he explained.
"Hmm." I groaned "What makes her so special?" I ask coldly.
"She wasn't an accident." he answered bluntly. I then felt my heart drop to the pit of my stomach.
"So we were huh?" I asked balling up a fist. He just shrugged nonchalantly and I couldn't hold it in anymore, so I ran and tackled him and just started hitting him. With every blow were years and years of hatred and resentment being released. But what shocked me most was that he didn't fight back, he just let me hit him and continue to punch him till I eventually got tired. And when I finally finished, my father was bloody and bruised but still managed to crack his normal evil smile.
"Do you feel better now?" he asked sarcastically. I ignored him and prepared myself to walk out till he called out to me. "Look I know I wasn't much of a dad to you, or your siblings and I didn't do right by your mother, but you don't have to be like me. If you really, really wanna start over you can. I don't want you to be like me Shawn, I want you to be better than me." I just rolled my eyes and walked out of the office and began walking back to the cab and was on my way back to airport. While on the plane ride back, I was thinking of ways to be better than my father, and to do that the first thing I had to do was find Kailyn.
