stained heart

unhealthy addictions

The next morning i woke up due to hearing a loud gasp. I opened my eyes to see a shocked Jay hovering over me. "What?" I mumbled but he just stared with a shocked smile. I looked to where he was staring and my face become bright red. I had my arms wrapped around the blonde. I felt so embarrassed. I see Jay laughing his ass off as he got out of the room. Amber was still asleep and i didn't want her to think i'm weird. I was gonna get up until i heard a grunt. She opened her eyes and yawned before she looked over to me. "I'm sorry-" I started but got cut off. "No.. i'm sorry i woke up at midnight and saw you.. i'm sorry i didn't take your hands off of me." She said and covered her face in embarrassment. A smirk appeared on my face as she said that. "Awh that's so cute, you just love having my arms wrapped around you, don't you?" I teased her and even though she was covering her face i could see that small blush. "Oh shut up." She said lightly punching me which i laughed off. We both went downstairs to see Jay talking with my brother. "And there they are." Jay said with a smile to my brother but as soon as he turned around to see us that smile changed into a smirk. I ignored it as i walked past him to get something to eat. I got some bread for both me and Amber as we sat down to eat. "I'm heading out now." Max said before going out. Max's work shift changes quite often. Me and Amber ate in silence with Jay looking at some tv. Jay looked a bit strange but i recognized that look. "Are you seriously drunk?" I asked him with a disappointed sigh. "What? Noo." He said so dramatically. I rolled my eyes at him before continuing to eat. "Where did you get alcohol?" I asked him. "I hid a bottle in your room." He said with a little smile. "And you aren't gonna give me anything?" I said before heading over to him. He handed me the bottle and i took a sip. "Damn it's like seven in the morning." Amber said as she rolled her eyes. Honestly i was a bit ashamed of what me and Jay did, it's nothing good and shouldn't be normalized. We just started doing this drinking thing when we met each other, both of us dealing with problems of our own. I could see that Amber doesn't really drink, only at parties. I decided to take the bottle and put it in the trash. "What the fuck was that for?" Jay argued. "Look i know we both talked about stopping but we never actually do it, can we start doing it now?" I asked him which made him groan. "Fine, i'll try." He said letting out a breathe. I smiled sheepishly before going to sit back next to Amber. I picked up my phone and saw a few notifications from Instagram. I must have forgotten that i posted. I looked at the post and it got a few likes, way more than normal but not an exaggeration. I read a few comments but one caught my eye. 

"Both loners and fagg0ts." One comment read. And what do you know? It's from Noah. I ignored it as i didn't reply to it. Didn't want to give him attention. I sighed before i placed my phone down. 

"I'm bored." Mavis groaned out. "Do you wanna draw?" I asked her as i placed my phone down. I see her lift her head up and slowly nod. "Jay probably won't want too since he's.." She motioned towards the boy that was now on the couch, asleep. We slowly went upstairs and she picked up a sketchbook that she had in her bag. I looked through it with her, even though she was kind of embarrassed of it. She could draw so beautifully. She decided it's enough embarrassment and grabbed the book from me. "But they are so pretty." I said but she cut me off. "Shut the fuck up." She said as i rolled my eyes. She grabbed piece of paper and gave me a pencil, told me i can freestyle.