𝘼𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣 [ 𝘼𝙐 𝙕𝙝𝙤𝙣𝙜𝙘𝙝𝙞 +18 ]

19: Welcome to the internet

Childe ran his hands inside the sleeves of his jacket, arranging the garment well as he straightened the ends, looking at himself in the mirror. It had been two days since he and Zhongli went to visit Teucer, two days since the police called him... Two days since they first had sex. Childe's feelings had become even more confusing, not only in his relationship with Zhongli but also with himself. He used to hate sex since the first time he had it, it had never been pleasurable to him: rather it was almost boring, unpleasant, and undesirable. But with Zhongli, it was not like that. With Zhongli, he could enjoy practically every second, except for the few moments when his mind reminded him of unpleasant events.

But overall, he felt pleasure. For the first time in his entire life, he felt pleasure; sexual desire. It wasn't the same warmth he felt, the one he called love, it was a different kind of feeling. Childe looked at himself in the mirror, how would his face have been distorted when Zhongli had been touching him? Had he put on one of those stupid expressions, like the ones those filthy old men put on? He remembered the sounds that came from his throat, and couldn't help but grimace. Was it okay for him to feel all that? For him to react that way? He had that right? Maybe it didn't make sense of being repulsed by that, but he did. And despite denying himself all those sensations, he wanted to feel that way again. He wanted more.

Childe sighed, passing his hand over his face and rubbing his temple. They were going to visit Teucer again, this wasn't the time to be thinking about his confused feelings and scrambling even more.

He walked out of the bedroom to the hall, where Zhongli was talking to Venti. It had been a couple of hours since the brunette had returned from work, and he and the dyer had barely been in the studio for a few hours that morning, so he had spent practically the whole day on the floor. The day before they had already explained to Venti about the result of his complaint, and Venti's reaction was quite... Aggressive. He began to shout and insult the air, obviously referring to his aggressors (he even spoke in Liyuen mixing words or even phrases in Monstadian). It took them a while to get him to calm down, but they succeeded.

Zhongli and Venti turned to look at him, stopping their conversation. They both seemed a little shaken, glancing at each other then back at him, uneasy for some reason Childe didn't know why. The redhead looked at the other two, raising an eyebrow.

"Something happens?" He asked, looking at the golden eyes, then looking back at the turquoise ones.

"No... Well, yes. But it's not... er..." Venti pressed his lips together, lacing his fingers together as he looked away. Childe frowned, looking at his boyfriend questioningly. Zhongli sighed.

"Someone posted some videos," he said, looking away. Childe realized that he had the phone in hand, nerves starting to kick in, uncertainty taking over his reasoning. Venti looked at the taller one through parted lips, then at Childe.

"You didn't have to tell him now...!" He reproached Zhongli, tightening his lips, taking his arm, and pulling a little. Childe walked over to them, trying to keep his cool. He swallowed hard, pinning his blue eyes into the golden ones.

"What videos?" Zhongli looked at him with sadness and fear, lowering his eyelids and then opening them again, tilting his head towards his phone, which he turned on. He touched the screen several times, and after several seconds, it showed him what had caused them to be in that state.

Childe felt his stomach lurch, the blood slowing down and his heart skipping a beat. One hand planted itself over his mouth, while the other grasped Zhongli's forearm, squeezing hard. His eyes fixed on the screen, his lids widening. It couldn't be real.

It was pornography. Videos of him. His face could not be seen, just like the clients, but he knew that this was his drum room. Childe knew how to recognize his own body, it was him. The quality of the recordings was very low, some could hardly be seen clearly because it had been the clients themselves who had recorded it: trying to make sure that he did not discover them, that he could not realize that they were recording the act. Childe suppressed a gag, listening to the sounds that were playing from the video, ducking his head. Zhongli stopped the video, putting the phone in his pocket.