𝘼𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣 [ 𝘼𝙐 𝙕𝙝𝙤𝙣𝙜𝙘𝙝𝙞 +18 ]

20: Moonlike Smile

Zhongli walked out of the office, smiling as he saw Childe leaning against the wall, turning to look at him. The redhead approached him, taking his hand nervously. Zhongli kissed his knuckles, trying to calm him down. He knew the tests and questions would have made him uncomfortable, but he'd done it anyway. Now they just had to wait for the results. He couldn't quite see his expression because of the mask, but he could tell for sure that he wasn't smiling.

"I want to go home," Childe whispered.

"Okay, let's go back," Zhongli laced his fingers together, beginning to walk through the waiting room toward the hallway. Childe stepped up beside him, squeezing his hand. Zhongli couldn't help but think that they hadn't used a condom when he fellated him, and he felt guilty about it. Childe was at risk of infection from his previous job, and if he caught something, he was sure the redhead was going to torture himself for it... The last thing Childe needed was also to have to worry about something that wasn't his fault. Zhongli squeezed his hand a little. The only thing he could do was wish that everything was alright.

"Do you think I'm going to have something?" Childe asked as soon as they entered the elevator and the doors closed, looking straight ahead. Zhongli tilted his head to look at him, his eyes reflecting the uncertainty he felt at the moment, the grip on his hand tightening.

"I don't know," he replied honestly. "But if you have something, nothing happens, we can continue having relationships. We'll have to always wear protection, but that's fine anyway," Childe's eyes narrowed.

"I don't want to infect you..." Childe looked back at him, pinning his blue eyes on the gold ones.

Zhongli could not describe in words the strong sadness and helplessness that seeing him that way caused him. He wanted to see him happy, but all the things that had happened to him and were still happening only complicated that desire. It seemed that with every step forward they took, two steps back, the goal was at an uncertain point. He had said that he would help him, and no doubt he was... But, sometimes, he felt that Childe was not completely honest with him, that he kept things to himself. Sure, everyone had things he didn't want others to know, but Zhongli felt it was important; something he should know. But what? He had no idea. Childe was a very enigmatic person, everything around him was a mystery.

He noticed the look on his face when he saw Lumine's expression the day before. He froze, his face twisted into a scowl that was only partially covered by the mask. He had tried to hide his discomfort, but he hadn't succeeded. Zhongli watched the videos, all four of them. He felt retching, wanting to hit those men with all his might... His chest had shrunk when he heard Childe's voice in that almost silent suffering, how he obeyed when given any order... Zhongli wanted to cry, and he did. Seeing Childe in such a vulnerable state broke his heart, it made him want to hug him for all eternity to let him know that at that moment he was fine and that he was not going to allow anyone else to hurt him again.

Zhongli wanted to protect Childe. He wanted all his problems to end, to put an end to that dark chapter of his life once and for all, to be able to turn the page. He wished that Childe could fulfill his goal of getting Teucer back, of being able to live a stable life. He had been a little disappointed in his response to the thought of getting married, but he didn't blame him for it either. It was too early to think about such things, along with everything that was going on... Though Zhongli wouldn't mind marrying him. He liked the idea, he could imagine a life with Ajax at his side, both of them could take care of Teucer: like a family. Zhongli took a deep breath, he had to stop making those scenarios in his head, concentrate on the present.

They left the hospital, walking towards the parking lot where they had left the car. It was quite late, and it had long since darkened. They walked in silence down the street, the lights dimly illuminating the sidewalk, while a few cars passed on the road, momentarily increasing the illumination. With each exhalation they made steam come out, the temperature had dropped quite a bit in recent days. Childe sneezed, tilting his head away from Zhongli and covering his mouth with his forearm (despite still wearing the mask). The brunette looked at him, walking a little slower.