See you in the dark.
Those were the words Inej had spoken to Kaz, merely an hour before.
Now all eyes were on him, her magician.
It was dark now, and Kaz had made everyone else around them disappear, simply by being right there beside her. He was cutting her to pieces on the inside--she wanted so badly to say something to him. She felt like she was in a cage, hostage to her feelings.
As she pushed through the crowd she would bump shoulders and brush skin, recoiling a bit as she did so.
Each time I break down a little. When you get me alone, it's so simple. Inej thought, wishing desperately they could be alone right then. I know what you know. We can feel it. We both understand this hatred of touch. Only us.
Finally, the Dregs decided he wasn't going to tell them anything about the job he'd just successfully completed and cleared out. As each Dreg filed out the door, it felt like all the pieces were falling right into place.
Now it was just Kaz and Inej in the room, caught up in the moment.
So it goes... I'm yours to keep. And I'm yours to lose. You know I'm not a bad girl, but I do bad things with you. So it goes... No matter how she phrased it, Inej couldn't get the words right. What was she meant to say to him?
She'd met him in a pleasure house. His eyes had been on her, his illusionist. Inej had made all his grey days clear and she had worn him like Tante Heleen's prized diamond necklace. But she had his heart, what was left of it.
He came towards her now, dressed him mercher black like always. Inej took in the slowness of his movements, stiff as if from pain.
So...so...so it goes... Inej's mind stuttered as she remembered the deep scratch-like knife marks down his back from the man who'd tried to stop him escaping the merch mansion.
Kaz would be fine, though, he always was. But with the way he was looking at her with those deep stormy-dark eyes she might not be. She couldn't look away from his gaze. He was only a foot away now.
"How are you feeling?" Inej's voice came out as a whisper, barely detaching itself from her throat as she forced some kind of noise out of it. At least it hadn't cracked.
Kaz was still looking deep into her eyes, his gaze softer than she'd ever seen it.
"I'm fine." Kaz's voice was rough, gravelly stone. It seemed to drag along--scraping as if against a rock. "Better than fine, actually."
Inej was too entranced in his eyes to reply. It was like he'd put a spell on her, a proper magician. Lost and transfixed, she missed what he said next.
"Sorry, can you say that again?" Inej snapped out of it, shaking herself mentally and feeling a blush creep across her face. A brief smile flickered across Kaz's lips.
"I might need your help on the next job. So I don't have to jump out a window again." Inej gave him a stern look.
"You jumped out a window? With your leg? Kaz! Are you trying to injure yourself?" Now he did smile at her.
"I'm fine, as I said. I only barely escaped becoming bloody ribbons, so I took the window option."
"I take it back that was probably the smarter option. Just don't do it again if you can help it." Inej shot him a scolding glare. His smile widened, dazzling her.
"Of course, love. Wouldn't dream of it." Love.
He'd taken to calling her that recently. Maybe she was just reading too much into it, but Inej rather liked it. She wouldn't ever tell him that, though.
Inej wondered what Kaz would do if she started calling him love or some other nickname like that.
She didn't have much time to ponder it, however, as Kaz was moving towards her until he leaned forwards and pressed his face into her shoulder, gently wrapping an arm around her.
"Is this okay?" Inej was shocked to hear how strained his voice sounded, how he seemed to melt into her arms. She put her arms around his waist, drawing him in and doing her best to ignore the shudder that went through her.
"Yes." She said softly, afraid to break the spell. "What's wrong, Kaz?" His body was so tense, but he did not let go, did not pull away.
"Don't go." Inej was confused.
"I'm not going anywhere." She didn't want to either. She was perfectly content to stay like this, standing in his arms here.
"Still," Kaz insisted, his voice still rough and low, as if he was fighting back the burn of tears. "Don't go."
"I'm not going anywhere," Inej repeated, more firm. "Not for quite some time."
"Thank you." Kaz whispered. Inej could feel him breathing deeply, both inhaling her scent and steadying himself. Perhaps one was the other.
Inej didn't go--she stayed right there in his arms, refusing to break this wonderful spell of warmth her magician had cast. Refusing to let anyone or anything take away this boy--her boy.
So, so, so it goes.
