Greys anatomy - FanFiction

Chapter 8

TRIGGER WARNING

The first few hours of my shift were slow, I spent my time charting and checking in patients. I was in the cafeteria getting lunch with Jo, Amelia and Arizona when some Callie came up to our table.
"Hey Sophie"
I looked up from much to see where the voice came from "what do you want Callie"
"I just felt like you should know that when I fucked your girlfriend it was real fucking good" she waved bye and left.
I got up and walked out of the cafeteria and headed directly to Addisons office.
I slammed the door "You fucking bitch, was me walking in on you screwing Callie not enough that you sent that whore to tell me all about it yourself"
"What is your fucking problem Sophie"
"She came up to me and told me all about how great it was when you fucked her"
"What, you can't handle hearing all about how great the sex was. We hardly ever had sex and then you disappeared WITH NO CONTACT. How was I supposed to know if we were still together."
"You know what, enjoy fucking her, I'm done" I walked out of her office and headed up to the roof.

I pulled out my phone and called the one person I knew could help me out.
"Charlotte, I need help, I can't stay here anymore"
"I'm coming to get to Seattle, where are you staying at the moment"
"I'm staying at Amelia's house, I'm at work right now but I need to leave."
"Leave work and go to Amelia's house and I'll be there as soon as I can okay"
"Thankyou Charlotte"

I went downstairs and into the bathroom, I paged Amelia 9-1-1 and then I started throwing up.
Amelia came rushing in "hey, I'm here it's okay, Charlotte called me, it's going to be all okay"
After 10 minutes I finally stopped throwing up, I had tears and sweat dripping down my face.
"Char- charlotte to- told you" I could barley breathe
"Yea she did and I'm coming with you to LA"
I smiled at her "ye-yea"
"Yea soph, I'm coming with you. Our trip made me realise I need a fresh start, away from here"
We stayed sitting on the bathroom floor for half an hour before Amelia suggests we go talk to Bailey.

"Sophie, Amelia, what can I do for you"
I was started panic. Amelia notice and held my hand
"So there was an incident with Addison and with everything that has happened this past year both Sophie and I have decided we are moving to LA to go work at Oceanside wellness."
I broke down crying "im sorry Bailey, I know you made all these changes for me and let me keep my job while I was gone and I-"
"Hey, it's okay Sophie, I know you are doing what's best for you and i will always be here to support you and if you too ever feel like coming back here at anytime, the door is open"

Two days later
Amelia was at work finishing up the last of her charts and some paperwork. I was with Charlotte packing up mine and Amelia's things.
"We still need to go to your apartment Sophie, I checked and Addison wont be there."
"Can you come with me"
"Of course"
We made the drive to my old apartment, my leg was shaking and i my anxiety was rising fast.
"Hey Sophie, look at me"
I couldn't get out of my own head. The words Addison said replaying in my head over and over
"Sophie, you're okay, look at me"
I couldn't move, I was stuck. I tried to tell her I can't talk but no words came out
Charlotte reached over and grabbed my hand, it stayed this way until we pulled up to my place.
Charlotte unlocked the door but I was frozen in place, the image of Addison on the couch fucking Callie was playing in my head.
She walked in front of me and whispered sweet nothings until I got outside of my own head.
"I uh I'm sorry"
"No need to apologise, let's grab your stuff and be gone"
Charlotte did my bedroom while I did the bathroom. I was looking through my draws when I found one of my blades, brand new. I stared at it until Charlotte walked in
"It's okay, I wasn't going to use it. I found it cleaning out the draw and uh there it was."
"Do you want to use it" I looked at her confused
"I don't understand"
"Well I mean it's in your hand and I know that look, I had the same one when I wanted drugs. You are an addict, it may not be drugs in your hand but it might as well be"
"Im clean Charlotte, I don't need it" even though these words left my mouth I couldn't stop staring at the blade, Charlotte is right. It's not drugs but it's the same feeling.
"Actually that's a lie. Im not clean, I never stopped."
"Can I see them"
I pulled the top of my pants down and showed her the perfectly straight cuts along my thigh.
"You keeping them clean" I nodded
"I wanna stop but I don't know how to."
"If that's what you want, we will take it one step at a time"

We finished loading the last few boxes into the car when Addison got out of her car.
"What's going on. Why are you going" she stepped closer to me which made me flinch
"I wouldn't hurt you Sophie, you know that right"
"Maybe not physically but you still hurt me. Amelia and I are moving to LA, the apartment is in yours now, do what you want. You can sure as hell keep the couch"

2 weeks later
Sophie's POV
Amelia and I found a house pretty quick and we've spent the past 2 weeks settling in and buying furniture. Charlotte got two offices set up at the practice for us.
I had been sitting in the shower for awhile, Im only just beginning to process everything that has happened in the past year. I was shaken from my thoughts by a knock at the door
"Hey soph, it's Charlotte can I come in"
"Yea"
"So I wan- oh Sophie your freezing and crying, let's get you out" Charlotte turned off the water, helped me up and wrapped me in a towel. She helped me get changed and brushed me hair.
"What's going on in that mind of yours"
"I- I uh- im not sure Charlotte. I don't know how to talk about what I'm feeling without being sent off to the psych ward. No one understands there just thoughts and feelings and that's all they are"
"Alright here's a deal, you tell me whatever it is that you wanna talk about it and I'll just listen and it will stay between us"
"You sure" I looked at her while tears formed in my eyes
"Yes Soph"
"I want drugs Charlotte, I wanna drink and get high. I think about cutting myself every second and nothing seems like it's getting better and I don't know how much more of this I can live with. I want it to all go away, I want to die sometimes Charlotte and that's awful and selfish. I'm so angry at Addison, she fucked one of my best friends in my apartment and showed her off around the place we worked and expected me to be okay with it"
Charlotte just hugged me and let me cry. She didn't try to fix me or send me to some place.
"How about we go watch a movie" I gave her a nod and a small smile

Amelia's POV
I walked into my house after my first day back at work and saw Charlotte and Sophie on the lounge, snuggled together.
Charlotte careful moved Sophie's head and walked over to me.
"Hey, how was she today"
"I came here and she was sitting in the shower, the water was freezing and she was in tears"
"I'm sorry I was-"
"No don't do that. We talked and she just wants us to talk to her normally and not walk on eggshells around her. She's scared Amelia, she is terrified to talk to anyone because she doesn't want us to send her away"
"Oh god, okay. I mean what do we do from here"
"She's goes back to work tomorrow and we will help when she needs it, but we treat her like a person, not someone is who is broken"
"Okay. I have a question Charlotte"
"Yea"
"Do you like her"
"Yeah I do. I like her a lot"
We both stared at the sleeping brunette on the lounge, she looked so small and fragile but she is so strong.
"She's gonna be okay Amelia, I know it"