Rekindled Love

04

T/W: self-harm, sensitive words,
Read at your own risk.

『••✎••』

BUMAGSAK ako sa isang subject. I don't know why. I tried asking my teacher but she just keep on responding na may isang quiz daw akong naibagsak.

I was trembling nang nakarating ako sa bahay. I was shaking while I'm in front of my mother's office. Hawak hawak ang card habang nakayuko.

My eyes watered and I bow down while whole body's shaking. I'm afraid. So damn afraid.

“Give me the card,” she softly uttered.

I close my eyes tightly and slowly handed her the card. May pulang marka roon and that means, bagsak. It's so obvious that no need to search for it.

Unti-unti niyang ibinaba ang papel sa kanyang lamesa. I was about to sigh hard because I thought she's not mad but my eyes widened in so much shocked after witnessing what she did. Pinunit ni mommy ang card ko hanggang sa nagkapiraso piraso na ito.

“This?” ipinakita niya sa 'kin ang punit na papel. “Are you proud of this? Really? You came here just to hand this?” Her voice was calm but stern and I can feel the urge to shout.

Umiwas lang ako ng tingin at nanatiling nakayuko. I pinch my hand.

She slowly walk until she reach me.

“You know sweetie,” she caressed my hair softly. “When I was young, exactly at your age.. I wasn't as stupid as you. I was like Eirah!”

Tuluyan ng bumagsak ang luhang kanina ko pa pinipigilan. Again, comparing again. Eirah again.

“Noong nagpaulan ng kabobohan, katangahan at kahangalan, sinaulo mo yata lahat.”

Nothing's painful but hearing your mother saying those words, it broke me to death.

She gripped my hair tightly. Hinila niya ito ng sobrang lakas at higpit.

“You are so freaking stupid! I didn't raised you to be like that! And now? You did other things that could taint our family name! Really? Galing sa mga matatalino at successful na pamilya pero may isang bobong walang ibang ginawa kundi ang ipahiya ang pamilya? My God! What will my business partner and my friends say if they knew I had a stupid daughter like you? Nakakahiya ka!”

Pumikit lang ako at hinayaan siyang sampalin at saktan ako.

“Kasi anong inuuna mo? Paglalandi! Ayan! Hindi kita pinalaking malandi! I told you to act properly! I told you already to study well but what did you do? You didn't. You're disappointment in this family! A disgrace!”

Binitawan niya ang buhok ko at umayos ng tayo. She eyed me with a disgusting look on her eyes.

“Fix that grade. Kung kinakailangang bayaran 'yan, go on and pay! You should be like Eirah, she had the beauty and brain. Go to your room and never let me see your face.”

Agad kong sinunod ang utos niya. I immediately run to my room and cried there.

This is what I said, kaunting pagkakamali mo lang, sira ka na.