Disallowed ⇔ Matty Healy

Chapter 11

I finish reading over Adam's text, telling me he'll be here tonight and he'll bring all the lads from school. I can't help but feel it's only because i sent him a sneak preview of something i bought in the shop earlier. But whatever. He was going to find out at some point anyway. And least it worked. Because he's coming.

I managed to get in touch with Kelsi, and she's helped inviting people from school. So that's all done. I just hope not too many people turn up. I can't risk anything getting broken or ruined in this house. But then again Liv has helped. So I'm expecting the whole of my year to come through that door.

The front door slams against the wall, and Matty waddles his way into the kitchen, four boxes of beer piled up in his arms.

I frown across at him. "I don't think that will be enough" i voice my thoughts out loud.

He rolls his eyes at me after putting the boxes down on the counter. "No shit. I have done this before" he scoffs. "If you could actually get off your arse and help, there's a few more in the taxi outside" his voice getting louder the further he heads back out.

I struggle to put down the last box of vodka. I take a look at it all. "And now we have too much" i complain. We're not buying for the whole fucking city. We'll all get alcohol poisoning if we drink all this!

"Oh, shut up complaining" he laughs. "You can never have too much alcohol"

"How did you even get all this?" curiosity gets me. He's sixteen. Not eighteen.

He fakes a shocked face at me. Belittling me. "A thing called fake I.D"

God. This boy is impossible.

The sooner it gets to seven o'clock, the more fear and guilt is eating at me.

I check the time, seeing it's almost five. Shit. I sprint up the stairs and head for the shower to get ready. Like i said, everythinghas to be perfect. Including me. Well ... as close as i can get to it.

I check myself in the mirror again, after finishing my make up and hair. Deciding on a natural look, but adding a bit of black eye shadow and eye liner to go with the dress. I keep my lips the natural colour, but add a little lip gloss. In a lame attempt to make my lips stand out and catch Ad's attention. I leave my hair down. Hardly ever wearing it down, i thought it would make a nice difference. And i just boost it up at the roots. Giving it a edgy, messy look.

The more i look in the mirror. The more i dislike what i look like. I've never been one to wear dresses. And this short... seriously. I shake my head at myself. Wondering why I'm even doing this. What if Adam doesn't like it?

Whatever. I can't change now. I don't have time. I just need... alcohol. Anything. To take my mind off of it.

I hear faint voices from downstairs, informing me people have already arrived. I should be down there. No one even knows Matty yet.

I head down the stairs. "Yo. Matt, where you want this?" Someone calls out. Huh? He's already made a friend?

When i get to the bottom and see a guy holding another crate of beer. I don't even think i recognise hims myself. He turns around to me slowly. A smirk quickly playing across his lips and then wolf wistles at me.

"Oh just put them-" Matty's voice cuts off. And when i look across at him, he's staring at me. His mouth practically wide open like a baby bird, waiting to be fed. He clears his throat suddenly, averting his eyes away from me. "Just anywhere" he tells him.

I walk past him to get into the kitchen. Hoping some of my friends will have arrived already. But nope. Just him. Whoever the hell he is... I don't like this. We can't be having strangers in here.

"Matty!" i call him. His name rolling off of my tongue, as though i attempted to speak something foreign. That's the first time I've said his name out loud while he's been here. I sit myself down on the stool at the breakfast bar.

"Who the hell is that?" i ask, aiming to sound calm. But it came out anything but.

He laughs at me... of course. "George" he one words me.

I panic some more. A bit more information would of been nice. Like if you actually even know the guy!

He reads my expression. "He's an old mate of mine. God, chill out" he heads back out of the kitchen. Taking a bottle of beer with him.

Matty, has friends? Wow!

I wonder how they met. He looks older than him. The fact he has ink on his arms proves he has to be older. I bet he's a trouble causer. Just from the look of him. I'm going to have to keep an eye on him tonight.

Which reminds me. I need some of that alcohol. Like now. To help me get through this night. Just... not too much. Someone has to keep control on tonight.

An hour into the party. And the house is already packed out.

I'm failing, massively. At this, keeping control on the night. I sit with Kelsi and Liv in the kitchen. Playing this have you ever game. I don't really get the rules. I'm not really even listening. I just seem to be taking a drink whenever they do. If not more.

The vodka doesn't seem to be as harsh on my throat now. And even though this is the first time I've ever drank, I'm aware I've already over done it and had too much to drink.

I go to take another look around the house again to see if Ad's arrived yet. I fight to squeeze past people. And i find I'm actually glad to have drunk this much... because I'd be kicking off by now if i hadn't. There's far too many people in here. And the music is far too loud.

But all i care about right now is the fact Adam's not here.

I find Matty in the living room. Sat with that George guy and at least six girls surrounding them. yeah, and i thought what I'm wearing is slutty. Jesus. Did they like, forget to get dressed or something?

"Adam. my man!" A guy calls out from near the front door. I push past some more people to get out of the room. And practically throw myself onto him as soon as i see him. He already smells as though he's been drinking. Which instantly eases me up. Knowing he can't lecture me for being in this state myself.

He wraps an arm around me and bends down to kiss me. I thud of disappointment hits me when it's only a quick peck. Then he's off, heading into the kitchen with the lads.

I sigh, chewing on my lip, trying to ignore the fact he still seems to be off with me. It makes it worse becase i don't even know what I've done wrong.

I stand watching him as he stands at the doorway in the kitchen. A girl, who again. I don't recognise, rushes over to him. Doing the exact same thing i did to him five minutes ago. And throws herself into his arms. He smiles down at her. Seeming to be more pleased about seeing her than he did me.

An unfamiliar feelling hits me. It's not anger. It's not sadness. It's.......

"Move!" i rush for the front door to get out. I'm going to be sick!