Disallowed ⇔ Matty Healy

Chapter 19

~Della~

It was almost 11.am.

I couldn't believe I'd slept in that late. I must have needed it. When I eventually got to sleep. I laid there, staring at the door for basically a full hour, in fear Matty was going to come bolting through it to check I was still there.

The floor boards creaked under my feet - to my annoyance.

Trying my damn hardest to sneak down the stairs without making a sound. I was afraid the second Matty heard me, he'd be straight down. Demanding to talk or being my damn shadow again.

I couldn't face either of those things. Not today. Well, never again, actually.

I needed to get out of this house today. We both knew, deep down now, that we needed to keep our distance. Until this mess is just a distant memory.

I didn't bother with breakfast. I quietly put on my shoes, reached for my coat and managed to open the gates with minimal noise. I was quite impressed with myself. He must be a deep sleeper. Usually every little noise in this house wakes everyone up.

I was out of the garden in quick time and finally free. Now feeling as though I could breathe properly.

I wasted no time in texting Kelsi and Livia. I needed a distraction. I didn't care what they were up to. I just needed to tag along.

I knew they'd be up to something. Practically every Saturday morning, I'd get a text. Them begging me to tag along with shopping or going for a fancy meal. 'A spot of lunch' as Kelsi calls it.

But coming to think of it. I'd had nothing from either of them today. Which was odd.

I text Kels first *Wats the plan 4 today. I'm in! :) *

I didn't have chance to put my phone away. She replied back straight away.

*No plans. Bored :( What u fancy? Liv's had 2 work today*

*I'm down 4 anything. Starving thou!* I can't remember the last time I'd eaten.

*Beastro cafe? :)*

Yes. I love that place. They do the best fry ups.

*U read my mind. I'll get the bus and meet you there in half an hour? :) x*

*Meet you there x*

The bus was late. Kelsi was already stood out front of the cafe waiting for me. But something had definitely gotten her attention, as she was bent forwards, her back to me, staring through the window to something inside.

"What you noseying at?" I accused, shouting across to her as I began crossing the road to get to her.

She turned back around. An amused expression across her face. "Liv's in there" she pointed. Whispering as though Livia would be able to hear her. Which she clearly couldn't. So it made me burst into laughter.

"The little fibber. So she't not working?" I tried looking behind Kels to see her. But I couldn't spot her.

"She's on a date" Kelsi said, excited. Turning to watch her again.

"What?" I had to see this. I pushed Kels out of the way, to the side. So I could see.

A thud instantly hit me in the chest. Knocking all the air out of me....

"Oh my god" I mumbled in disbelief at what was in front of me.

"I know!" Kelsi laughed. "So much for 'I don't do dates' she tried mocking her, aiming to do her high pitched voice - and failed.

But I was in too much shock to laugh or react. Or even fucking reply.

Livia was sat in there, having a date, with Matty?

With Matty.....

How?

Why?

Fucking.... how?

Something took over me. And before I knew it, I was pushing at the door and making my way inside, heading over to the both of them.

But I had to stop. Both their hands rested on top of the table. Sat opposite one another. And all was fine, until my gaze dropped, seeing Matty place his hand down on top of her hand.

It was just casually resting on hers. Like it was normal. Natural. His fingers lightly brushing across her knuckles as he smiled across at her. Then bursting into laughter at something she'd said.

She's not even that funny!

I shook my head. Not even knowing the feeling that was pulsing through me.

Was it anger? Hurt? Humiliation? I don't fucking know!

"Leave 'em be!" Kelsi whispered into me, oblivious to how I was feeling. Before heading for a table near the door. Which was thankfully the one furthest away from them.

I forced my gaze away from them. Realizing that if they were to spot us, this would be even worse for me. I didn't know how I'd end up reacting.

I scurried across to her, standing in front of her. My appetite vanishing.

"Can we go, please?" I asked, not bothering to take the seat opposite her.

"What?" she gazed up from the menu that was already in her hand. "I thought we were eating"

"Funnily enough, my appetite's disappeared"

"What?" she chuckled again. Completely ignoring my request as she began reading the menu again.

I had to tell her. Tell her who he is at least. It would seem more weird when it comes out that he's my foster... brother. That I didn't say anything when it's obvious I've seen him here with her now.

I bend down lower, aiming to say it as quiet as possible, in fear they would snap their heads around to us any second now and see us. I really didn't fancy making this a table for four with them.

I definitely wouldn't be able to stomach any food having to watch them gushing over each other in front of me.

"That's Matty she's with" I whispered into her.

"Who?" she really wasn't even giving me her attention at this point. "Think I'm going to get a bacon sarnie" she nodded along to her comment.

I rolled my eyes at her lack of concentration. Or ignorance. "Did you hear me?"

I tried again. "The new kid. Who's coming to our school on Monday, Matthew. That's him!" I quickly nodded across to them. "He's my-..

"No way!" she slammed the menu down onto the table, making a huge snapping sound, sound around the whole room. "I knew she'd get first dibs" She practically shouted out. And I felt as though she was just purposely aiming to get their attention now.

I rolled my eyes and dropped down into the spare seat. Knowing that would have done it. And I was right....

"Girls. Come join us!" Liv shouted across to us in a cheery, excited tone.

I can't do this.

"Tell her no!" I whispered harshly at Kels, shaking my head, begging her with my eyes to realize my desperateness.

"You're being weird!" Kels accused with a giggle. Already standing and going against my plead and began walking across to them.

I'm not doing it. It's too.... weird.

I got up, aiming to get out and away from here as quick as possible.

But just as I yanked the door back to leave, I heard Liv asking where I was.

I peeked a glance over my shoulder, feeling as though I was being watched.

I was.

Matty.

His eyes latched on me, burning into me. Watching me as I left.