TXT Oneshots - REQUESTS CLOSED

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Hey lovelys! Uhhhh it's been a while ummmm I don't like saying that but it's been a couple months I think??? Idk but uh y'all probably wondering where I went and where my last one shot request is uhhhh good news and more bad news let's start.

Okay so good news was that my request for a beomkai smut was actually almost finished like a couple days ago I was really speeding through with that writing and I was so close to finishing it, it was a really long and an enjoyable lots of feels oneshot too! but I unfortunately (and ofc am cursed to) ran into an issue and the doc I was using it to work on apparently no longer exists on my drive. My computer was being weird with the internet so I had to restart it to fix it and I opened it back up and all of a sudden it said my document didn't exist and it disappeared from my drive and my google docs, in front of my eyes yall. I saw that beomkai  file just vanish. Yeah. I don't know what happened really and I can't get it back because I've been trying to get it back for two days but I guess I am not allowed to have any nice things. and I just can't rewrite all that because it was TWELVE THOUSAND WORDS AND SEVENTEEN PAGES LONG NO JOKE and I just lost the energy and will power to write that much when I realized I couldn't get it back. And I'm so sorry for that. I don't even know if I'm going to keep that request or how long I'm going to take to write again or anything on this app. But I'm sorry for the person who requested that because I even messaged them saying I was working on it and I was so excited but the universe said fuck you in like the third worst way it possibly could. It was such a good god damn oneshot too ugh the shit I was serving in that oneshot was archive of our own material y'all. I'm pissed off and honestly just really bummed out. That event didn't help my mental health. So next order of business okay so uhhhh

Long story short, I want to not exist on this planet and I'm very close to quitting absolutely everything in my life including writing and being alive to be honest. (But don't like call the police or sum plz I won't do it) I'm having a really hard time in every aspect of my life and I'm just so not okay mentally. I'm dealing with so much at school and so much at home and a lot of trauma I've been through has been coming back up into my mental health cuz I never got help for it so yay. BUT I'm getting help I promise I'm trying but it has been so hard for me to get anything done and even enjoy the things I want to do. That oneshot being deleted off of freaking google docs was my last straw. I wish I was happier and more motivated to write more because I truly miss it but I'm sorry I just can't. I miss you all so much and I miss myself too. Please understand I'm telling you this because I want you to know that I've been trying and I just can't try anymore. I've been writing and now I can't. I wish I could tell you I'm going to speed run through all my updates soon but I'm not, I know I'm not. I'm really lost in my life right now guys. It's a really horrible feeling. And jt sucks because all I've been doing is disappointing you all and I'm so sorry for that. Anyways I'm sorry for laying this out but I needed to update you guys on something. Please don't feel hurt if I hurt you or hurt that I'm suffering I just want you all to know I still love you and I still love writing I just don't love myself right now and I don't love where I'm at with my life that isn't even a life yet. I'm sorry about the oneshot and I'm sorry about this update and I'm sorry about everything. Please forgive me I just need time, so much time, and a break. I love you lovelys and I'll continue to miss you every day <3

Off topic but if you could at least do this for me I'd legitimately appreciate it. I have to do an important environmental science experiment for my ess class and it's been stressing me out that I don't have enough responses for my data in the quiz for the experiment so could literally any of you just take five minutes and complete it? It's short and not that hard I promise. I'm literally just begging for responses lol and if you don't want to do it, that's literally fine like I won't take offense I'll still love you as my own soulmate promise <3

Here's link to quiz: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfnmYO5iRlpQUNi_GSE7pKAdwMGbfHhQvaZDjKkMePICmvw_Q/viewform?usp=sf_link

Actually Idk if the link works if it doesn't and you would like to take it just dm me

Anyways bye y'all I love you, thank you so much for supporting me still and existing and always being patient I love you <3