Endless Addiction | Completed

61

Analia Rayne ||

"Princess, your hands are shaking."

I cup my hands together forcing them to stop. "I'm fine."

"Ryder told me to make sure you're okay to do this on your own...I don't think you are."

I look at him in the reflection of my vanity mirror. "I am. It's just nerves." I push the chair and stand up. I straighten out my outfit, well catsuit if you would like to get technical. I have my hair tied back in a low ponytail with my boots. I really do look like an assassin right now.

"Let me at least come with you. To accompany you and make sure everything is okay?" He suggests. I need to do this on my own. Be on my own. I shake my head and his face falls.

He travels after me as I leave my room. "Ana, I don't think it's a good idea you go by yourself."

"Why not? I'm perfectly capable of doing this whole thing on my own. I've killed enough people to know basics of it."

"You've killed four people. That's not nearly enough experience for hands-on killing," he tells me. "What if he tries something? Pulls something on you? What then? You'll be on your own."

"I will be fine. He doesn't know any of that stuff." I hope. But again I haven't seen him in two years so god knows what he can do.

"Why do you want to go so badly on your own?"

"Because-." I pause trying to get all my thoughts together. "He's the guy who raped me. It's my trauma. My shit to unload, not yours or anyone's. I don't want anyone there to see it firsthand. You guys have seen enough. And again, I don't want people having to do shit for me. I don't want you to step in and have to kill him for me if I can't do it. It needs to be me, Gio. Me."

His whole body falls and sighs, "How about this-." I groan. "Gio!" He starts up again covering my
mouth. I look down at his hand and back at him narrowing my eyes.

"Listen," I roll my eyes, "Okay mini Ryder. Anyways, let me come with you BUT I won't go inside. I'll stay outside the whole time and if you need help just bang on the door, okay. Sounds like a deal?"

He lets go of his hand on my mouth and I wipe my mouth. "Fine. But you stay outside the whole time not stepping a single foot in there. I mean it."

He crosses his heart, "I won't." He goes into his room rushing to get dressed. I then see Belle cuddled up on the couch. Did she just hear that?

"Yeah I heard everything," She says. Great. "I think it's a good thing you're letting him come. He's right and I'm not just saying that because he's my brother but because he is."

"I know," I sigh walking over to her, "I just want to do this on my own. It's my trauma, my business."

"I know."

I pause. Should I even be talking to a sixteen-year-old about this? "How are you so okay with the killing talk? Was it like this back home?" She nods her head. Wow. I can't imagine growing up around constant killing. That'll definitely take your childhood away.

"I'm sorry," I tell her. "But now think of this as a fresh start. You can start over here. Even though you'll still be around killing but not in the same sense, you know?"