Freak ~Juuzou x Reader AU~

Chapter 10: Suffocation of Night

My eyes are heavy. So heavy. They burn with a tired dryness that is irritating. Irritating and loathsome.

I am so tired. So, so tired.

My body is quivering, my lips trembling. I blink almost drunkenly, the neon glow of the digital clock staring at me. 2:25 a.m. It's so late. All I want to do is close my eyes and sleep.

Sleep.

The thought of it alone sounds so nice and appealing. That is all I want to do. To close my eyes and drift off into a deep, deep sleep. However, no matter what I do, I can't. I just can't go to sleep. Because...because every time I close my eyes, I'm teleported back to that night.

Every time my eyelids flutter shut, images of those men worm their way into my mind and it's almost as if I can feel them. Their presence, which is absent and cold in reality, is almost overwhelmingly hot, burning and smothering me. And it's almost as if I can feel a set of strong hands wrapping around my neck, squeezing tighter and tighter as my body is lifted, and I choke, coughing abruptly.

Of course, every time I choke and wake abruptly, my eyes flutter open to a dark and empty apartment. Nothing but the inky shadows greet me. That and the quietness of the night.

But for a brief moment, I always sit, my heart puttering as my pulse rages in my ears. Then, as my eyes adjust to the darkness, I scan the room to see that no one is here. It is just me. All by myself. All alone.

Then I relax. Or at least attempt it. My muscles are still tense, a few of them twitching, but my breathing is starting to even. Slowly, I calm my heartrate and sit up, my mind now too awake to even bother with attempting sleep. It's pointless.

With a crutch under my arm, I hoist myself up and hobble into the kitchen, passing my bedroom door along the way. Both bedroom doors are pulled closed, giving me no view of what lies beyond them, but I don't need to look in to know. And to be honest, I don't currently want to even know. It's just too...too much right now.

I limp into the kitchen and retrieve a glass, filling it with water. I stand at the sink, gulping it down as my eyes watch the outside world. In these night hours, H/P looks quiet. Maybe because it is.

Ever since the city's slipped into this state of panic and the curfew has been mandated, these already quiet hours have grown even quieter. Below, the streets are empty, the light of the streetlamps pooling on the pavement. There are no cars whisking or driving by. No headlights sitting at the red lights. No people passing the crosswalks. Just the black emptiness of the night.

Once upon a time ago, I found comfort in these hours. I found refuge in them. There was peace and a certain clarity. The air was warm and lighter. But these days...there is none of that. No comfort. No refuge. No peace or clarity. There is only this long stretch of a never-ending nightmare.

That is all there is.

**Hello, hello lovelies! Well, not gonna lie. Today is a bit of a filler chapter. I'm not 100% here today. It's a gloomy day and I have work in like, less than two hours. So, there's that. But other than that, I'm excited for tomorrow. Eventually, I'll explain why lol. But yeah...that was today's chapter. Thank you oh, so much for everything! Y'all are the bee's knees! Wuv yous!! <3**

-Noel Ross