Hypothetically

Attachment Issues

All I want to do is be close
Have someone there
Someone to share prose
It hardly seems fair
That when I finally share a volume
A small piece of my mind
I get left behind

If they get attached everything is fine
But as soon as it is me
they are no longer mine
Oh to once let my thoughts be free
Yet i lay at night
In my bed all alone
Thoughts racing in my head

I want to push them all away
One day then the next
More than anything to stay
And once there gone
There's nothing I could say
To bring them back

I contradict myself
Regularly never knowing
What I truly want
Words in mind flowing
Wanting, waiting to be said
But to who
When no one's there
I'm reminded life isn't fair

I like to be alone
But to not be lonely
Something I haven't known
Surrounded by constant chatter
But no one knows nor cares
What's really the matter
Something there to share
All the best times of euphoria
And the worst times of sadness
High and lows
Every thought simply flows

Just once, I want someone to stay
Without my pushing them away
Or leaving one day
Because I'm tired of having to say
I'm not just alone
But once again lonely