Cut To The Feeling (Reader x Professor Ren / Kylo Ren)

Everyone Has Their Reasons... I Guess

You weren't going to go to class today, but you couldn't do that.

It was nearing the end of the semester, and you couldn't afford to miss a thing. But more than anything, you just wanted to curl up in a ball on your bed and do nothing for the foreseeable future. 

With that ruled out as an option, you got an early start to your day. It had been several days since your altercation with both Kylo and your mom, and you hadn't heard from either party. The insufferable feeling of loneliness that had followed was the worst part, but you figured that it would possibly help if you were able to get up and do something nice for yourself. 

You were walking across campus with the intention of going to get coffee and a pastry. That always seemed to help. You prayed that you wouldn't have to lay eyes on Kylo, and to aid in that happening, you were walking forward with your earbuds in and your nose basically pressed against your phone. 

It was a beautiful, clear day with low humidity, and things weren't seeming too bad. 

Until you ran into something (someone?) incredibly hard. 

Your phone fell to the ground, and you bent over quickly to pick it up. As you came up, you saw Katelyn looking down on you with a scowl. You pulled out one of your earbuds, your face immediately dropping. 

"You should really keep your head up, you know?" She said, brushing off the front of her vintage band tee. 

"I'm so sorry, Katelyn. I didn't mean to get in your way," you said as sardonically as you could manage. 

"Oh, while I have you here," she crossed her arms. "Did you get your edits done for Professor Ren? I'm sure you had a lot to do."

You bit the inside of your cheek. "Katelyn. I'm really not in the mood to entertain your bullshit today."

"Oh, I'm just genuinely curious. We have to have it ready for Francesca, you know?" She raised a brow. 

The sound of the name made your skin heat up, bringing up feelings you had been trying to manage for days. 

"Yes. I know. I have it done, since you seem so concerned," you looked around the campus, making sure the coast was clear of any Kylo Rens. 

"I'm surprised you actually were able to write something. You know, considering how hard it is for you to get words down on paper," she smiled with condescending pity. 

You took a deep breath. You wanted to keep it all in. You really did. But today was just not the day. 

"You know, I don't know why you feel the need to be so fucking unkind," you put your phone in your pocket, gearing up to let loose. "You are so mean to me for no reason whatsoever. What does that help you accomplish? Huh? Why me? What did I do? I've never said a word to you to belittle your ability as an artist. Your incessant need for validation was never my cup of tea, so I didn't suck the farts out of your ass like everyone else does, but I have never been mean to you." At this point, you were yelling. You weren't holding back even though there were people around. Katelyn was still standing there, arms crossed, looking at you with widened eyes. "And it doesn't make sense. You have everything. You're gorgeous, you're talented, you've never had to work a day in your life for anything because everything is just handed to you because you're Katelyn. You're the beautiful, cool, cultured film girl who has written a ton of great scripts and will surely be a successful filmmaker when you leave this place. You're fucking winning, and you still find it necessary to be a raging cunt to me!"

 Katelyn said nothing. She blinked, taking in all that you had just said to her. You stood there, breathing rapidly as you tried to bring yourself back down from wherever you had just come.