The Next Chapter

Chapter 59

Emery's POV

The water's really cold for the first few seconds but then it hits the perfect temperature. 

"Turn around." I tell him. "I need to reach your back but you're huge so I can't do it from here."

He smirks and does as I say. "I'll take that as a compliment." I start to wash his back with just water to get rid of the vomit that's left. I'll take it that he's enjoying it since he's resting his head on the wall and lets out a sigh. 

"Is it good? Or maybe too hot or too cold? Is it too much pressure? I can turn it down-" 

As I reach for the thermostat he grips my arm, "It's perfect." 

I would lie if I said that there wasn't a spark. Why was there a spark? Do I want there to be a spark? I shake rid of my thoughts and go back to cleaning his back, he hands me the shower gel and I continue. When I'm done with the back I ask him to turn around again.

"Do you want to do your front and hair yourself?" Why am I so nervous? 

"Would you mind doing it?" 

I shake my head and turn on the water again. I feel him take a deep breath as I touch his stomach. I walk closer to him to reach the sides and I feel his arms grab my waist. I look down at them and then back at him.

"I need to steady myself."

"Sure." That was the worst lie I've ever heard but I let it slide, he is hungover after all.

I lean closer to his face to make sure I get every inch of his stomach and sides. I hear his breathing quicken, mine does too. All of a sudden he rests his head in the crook of my neck. I should tell him to back off, to take the shower himself but for some reason, I don't. I let him.

My body is set on fire when I feel his lips on my neck. I lean my head backward without realizing it and his kisses become more eager. He starts moving up towards my ear and then he pulls me to sit on his lap. He's clearly very excited, I am too. 

He stops and pulls away, his hands still on me. "I'm not doing this if you don't want to." He says, almost breathless.

"I... I don't know what I want." I look at him, "What do you want?"

He looks me in the eyes, his breath uneven still and he turns off the water. "I want you. All I ever wanted was you." And with that, his lips are on mine. Crashing into each other in a passionate and longing kiss. We don't start slow, both of us are immediately eager and our hands are going all over each other. His hands trail my breasts and then get to the bottom of the shirt. In one swift move, it's off. 

He pulls away from the kiss to look at me, "Fuck. How do you do these things to me?" I don't have time to respond before his lips crash on mine again, this time he gets up and turns me to the wall, pushing me up and wrapping my legs around his waist. His hands are all over me, from my ass to my breasts to the back of my neck. Mine travel too, from the side of his head to following the lines of his abs and finally down to his erection. He shivers and lets out a shaky breath into my mouth. Our lips still on each other I can feel him mouth 'Fuck' as I begin to stroke it up and down. 

He puts his hand on mine and looks me in the eyes. "We're not doing this if you don't want to. I don't want you to be uncomfortable or feel forced to-" I don't let him finish the sentence, my lips are on his and my hand starts moving faster. He's eager, so am I. Within thirty seconds we're both completely naked and he has me pinned against the wall, not being able to move. I don't want to either. 

"Condom." I say into his mouth but as soon as that word leaves my mouth so does he, stepping away. "No." He mutters to himself, rubbing his temple. "Shit... We can't do this."

"What? I thought you wanted this?" 

"I do. More than anything Emery, but not like this. Not when you're still with him." I can see his jaw clench at the mention of Michael. I'd been so caught up in this moment that I forgot about him. But Jake is right, we can't do this.

But at the same time why do I feel so humiliated? 

Jake steps out of the shower and wraps a towel around his hips. "Close the door on your way out." And with that, he's gone. And I'm left, naked, humiliated, and confused in his shower. 

What the fuck just happened? 

When I left his apartment he wasn't in the living room, he had probably gone up to his room. I didn't think to say goodbye to him. He was very clear to me that I should leave. 

Once outside I'm faced with the reminder that I didn't come by car. No- I didn't come in my car. His car is perfectly parked outside of the apartment but I have no idea whatsoever where I am. I pull out my phone and click on Google Maps to show me to the nearest bus stop. And after about thirty minutes, I'm home. No one is there when I enter so I assume that they're still at Trevor's place. The thought of returning to them to celebrate flashes quickly in my mind before I dismiss it. I have absolutely no strength left in me for that. 

I can still feel them. His fingers gripping my hair, his lips on my lips, his tongue on my neck, his hands... God his hands. 

Am I crazy?

Yes.

Stupid subconscious. 

--- --- --- --- --- ---

That's it! Hope you liked it and I'll see you next time!