Bad Sanses x Reader: Parody Version

Parody Eight - The Movie Night Cliché

"What movie do you wish to watch?"

"You just dragged me here."

Nightmare was rummaging the cabinets in search for DVDs of Undernovela movies. Y/N assumed there was no Netflix or internet in here, judging by the DVDs. Besides, why would they need an internet for? They could teleport to worlds and search for information if they want it. "Maybe that one. That one looks old and used, it must be a great movie." Y/N said.

"And how can you tell?"

"Tattered cover. Also regularly removed judging by how clean it is inside and dirty on the outside. Someone's been repeatedly watching this. Loves it so much, they brought it to different places. It also isn't dusty even if it's old, so it's regularly cleaned and used well like a good old book. Must be a fan. Can only suspect Error glitch here."

"Ah right. I should've expected that."

"What are you guys watching?" Killer popped out of nowhere and sat beside Y/N. They explained to him the details and he huffed at Nightmare. "Boss, how could you force this poor human here?" He said.

"I'm still your superior, Killer. Don't speak to me with such disrespect."

"The canon version of you wouldn't care. They only care about eternal suffering throughout the whole multiverse and let everyone die including himself." Y/N said.

"And how can you tell- ah, nevermind. Let's just watch this. Get out of here, Killer."

"Boss! I wanna watch too."

"I won the flirting game, right? Its promise was to keep the human for a week. And I want the privacy. Shoo."

"Strange." Y/N said. "The cliche was supposed to be all of us watching together. I guess there's a different cliche instead of the general one."

"Exactly what they said. Now shoo."

Killer left like a whiny kid pouting and storming his way out of the room. They watched the movie, or rather, Y/N observed 87% of it. "They shouldn't overdramatize the dialogue." Y/N commented. Another was "He's too manipulative anyone can notice that. Why can't she see it? Probably because it's too painful for her to admit it." Or "Ugh, the usual cliche where the man promises to the girl to give it his all for her eternal happiness and die together in the afterlife, shit like that. Seriously though, it's rather amusing-"

"Can you not be a sadist for once and just watch the goddamn movie?"

"I'm not being sadistic, I'm being factual. Logical."

"Well then, take your feelings and see why people perceive it differently."

"Because they let their emotions cloud their judgment." Y/N sighed in pity. "Emotions are overrated. They are merely suggestions and not commandments. Yet people operate through emotions, no matter how logical they think they are. It's not the emotions that are at fault, but the beliefs and actions you make and do with it. Emotions and behavior are two different things that people should separate to make their lives a little less cruel."

"I didn't know you were a pessimist."

"Correction, I am a realist. Please don't mistake it for hyper negative thinking."

"Well, can't you at least treat this like a... Date?" Nightmare said the last word reluctantly. Y/N felt like laughing but didn't. "Pardon? This is a date?"

"No but... Just pretend it's one."

Y/N stared at him incredulously, looking into the depths of his soul for answers. "Ah..." They said, "I see what's going on in here. I assume you're thinking about unwanted thoughts of romantic love with me and you also thought of me sitting on your lap. Is that it?"

"Can you fucking pretend your clueless for once-?"

"That's gross, but normal cliche. And even if I want to pretend I'm clueless, I can't. I can see it just by looking at you, and can't help but try and verify it."

"Who even wants to be with you when you can invade their privacy?"

"I had acquaintances, but they told me to piss off after that. Now I only have acquaintances underground. Better than on the surface."

"What's it like on the surface?"

Y/N was quiet when he asked. They shrugged it off and told him. "Surface is wide and huge. It's an endless journey around the world. You can also meet other people with different cultures, fall in love, hang out with friends, cry over problems, you get the basic gist people are fond of. Now when someone like me comes along, they reject me just because I don't follow the standards of normal for them. But what is normal? Normal is what humans invented so they don't go crazy and dive off a bridge. There is no such thing as truth and normal. It's all an illusion."

Nightmare slowly nodded his head trying to process the information they gave. It made sense. "You do seem abnormal. But now you said it, I guess it's because I have a different standard of normal."

Dust and X sans gave zero fucks when they barged in the living room. They didn't care about Nightmare's scoldings at all. They squished in the couch with Y/N and asked them questions about the movie, ignoring Nightmare's demands to get the hell out. Horror and Killer followed their decision until Error sans did too. Everyone squished into the couch with a pissed off Nightmare sans. "I told you to get the fuck out."

"Sorry, did I hear something?" Murder said. "Oops, looks like it's just a bug."

"What did you say-?"

"Pleaease *BEEP* sileence ever-yone. *BEEP" I'm watching."

"Hahaha! You look terrible, Y/N." Killer said hugging their hand. Y/N flicked his head suggesting they dislike it. "Aw, why not?"

"Disgusting. Get off me." Y/N replied.

"You want chocolate?" Cross asked them. Y/N denied it. "Another cliche where you don't want to share your chocolate to everyone except me. No, I'm not letting that happen."

Y/N avoided every single cliche that was possible in a movie night with goons. A fight sparked because of it and what stopped it was Y/N throwing biscuits at them. Nightmare was getting tired of dealing with his minions and decided that he teleports Y/N to his room. "Even if they want to, they can't enter in here. Means we get the privacy we want here~" Nightmare flirtatiously said. Y/N cringed at it. "Don't do that again."

"Okay fine. It doesn't suit me anyway. Who even does it?"

"The fans like it when you flirt with them. Makes you look hot, they think. They don't bother asking why they think you're hot when you do that. You're just a guardian who got bullied and got corrupted. If someone were to ask me who's better looking, I'd say your uncorrupted version."

Nightmare had enough and pushed them on the bed. He placed two arms between them. "Sometimes your words annoy me so much, yet I can't do shit to you. Can't you act clueless for once?" He pushed his head closer to theirs and got headbutted. "Sorry but, I'm just avoiding the cliches as best as I can. Remember, this is not real. Anyway, don't do that again."

"Okay fine. It doesn't suit me anyway. Who even does it?"

"The fans-" Y/N sighed in annoyance. "You know what? Nevermind." They said and left the room.