Bad Sanses x Reader: Parody Version

Parody Eleven - The Rescue Cliché

Introducing new characters: The star sanses.

Ah, typical groups who rescue Y/N in their distress. The ones who somehow can't save Y/N after 40 chapters of planning. The ones who were made stupid and weaker than the villain sanses. The ones who can't get a canon dose in fanfictions for once. The ones who always get delayed for more villain angst.

"So you're saying that your AU was destroyed by random psycho sanses and they kidnapped a human named Y/N?" Swap sans, preferably Blueberry or Blue, asked Frisk. Frisk nodded vigorously.

"Yes other sans. And why haven't you come sooner? It's been 10 chapters since!" Frisk complained.

"Sorry, we got delayed for some reason. But don't worry, the spotlight is finally on us!" Ink sans said. He was planning with Dream sans a rescue mission to save Y/N's sorry ass. Because they have no clue where the bad sanses' secret base was, they have to wait for one of them to attack and follow them to there. "Hm, no no no... I have a feeling that won't work and we'll just be delayed 12 chapters more with that strategy." Ink said. "Let's just pray to the creator that we'll find out about their base somehow-"

And as if his wishes were heard, it was answered by Ink remembering the secret base of the bad sanses, or rather, given to him. "Aha! I remember their base now. Let's plan a rescue mission immediately!" Ink exclaimed snapping his fingers.

Blueberry looked at him perplexed by the sudden change. "I thought you have memory issues? You forget things easily." He said.

"What? Pfft nah, who cares at the moment? I remembered and it's time to save the day!" Ink said. Dream and Blue did not like where this is going.

At Nightmare's castle, Y/N had a gut feeling the storm was coming. There were many cues to just ignore it. The bad sanses didn't talk to them much and they were quite busy to keep an eye on them. Y/N assumed she was about to get rescued. The end is near. They went to their room and locked the door to wait for it themselves. After an hour of reading, the star sanses appeared in the room out of thin air.

"So you came, the heroes of the story." Y/N said a bit surprised that their guess was right. The three introduced themselves and Y/N knew they've been used to a lot of nonsensical cliches. "So... Dream, right? Nightmare's brother?"

Dream was startled. "How did you kno-"

"Make a better job in hiding your family picture next time." Y/N said indicating to his pockets. Dream was flustered and tucked the picture inside his gloves. "Nice cape. I assume your brother used that to cover the tree's scar." Y/N continued.

"How do you do that-?"

"Okay, stop toying with us. They told you, didn't they?" Ink said. Y/N had their usual poker face on. They weren't the type to make stupid jokes. "Of course not. What reason do they have to tell me, Ink? What made you assume I became their friend immediately? Do I look like I'm toying with you? I am being serious here."

Ink was creeped out and told the others they were saving a freak. "I think the human is just too smart to figure us all out. I'm sure they mean no harm." Blue said. Y/N already made their conjectures of them.

'Blue.' Y/N started with him. 'Fanon Blue for sure. The type who starts with don't hurt anyone. The type who'd spare even his biggest enemy. Naive, too kind, too childish. The canon one isn't like this for sure. His armor and scarf indicates a Papyrus-like character. He acts like him but a Sans, so a personality switch. He's a swap version. So Blue is just a nickname for Swap sans. He smells like tacos, so he probably likes to make or eat tacos. A replacement for Papyrus's love of spaghetti. That would make a lot of sense for this guy, but I shouldn't jump to conclusions easily. What if I'm wrong? I'll keep it to myself for the meantime.'

'Next is Dream sans.' Y/N continued their inner rambling. 'Nightmare's young brother. The picture wasn't the only thing that hinted me on the fact, but also the subtle resemblance, and let's not forget the crown he's wearing. Though I've known it for a while now, he's much smaller in person. This guy is not the canon version, and it seems like people have misconceptions about him. He seems frail and weak, or so people think about him. The type who doesn't want to hurt anyone but gets himself injured in the end. They make him dumb and a no-brainer in fanfictions, a pity. Maybe he's much better in canon than everyone believes.'

'Lastly Ink. This guy isn't someone to mess with in canon, but I wonder what people think about him in the fanon version. He's a mysterious character. The sash... what is it for? Does he use it to create? Does it act like his materials for creating? With that brush? No, there seems to be more to it... I heard Error hates this guy. He would've killed him a long time ago, but how come he's still alive? Either he's stronger or... or Error can't kill him. He's the type who will annoy you to the ends of the earth.'

Ink made a portal to guide Y/N out. "You're welcome." He said. The door of the room was smashed open by Horror's axe. He used his blue magic on Y/N and pulled them close to him. "Oh no, here it goes." Y/N said rolling their eyes. "Help, I'm kidnapped again. Please save me, yada yada."

"You're not getting them, star sanses." Horror hissed at the group name. "They belong to us."

"I don't see your name on them." Ink said and grabbed his brush. Murder and Killer appeared on the scene, and Ink had a difficult time fighting them.

"Are you fucking kidding me? Why would fanfictions make you weaker, Ink? You could defeat these goons in no time." Y/N said. Ink didn't know what they were talking about, but he kept swinging his brush at the not-even-canon trio. "No Ink, stop being predictable. Hit them from behind, you're flexible! Brush them and chain them, it's simple. Stop swinging that brush cluelessly." Y/N admonished.

"Can you just shut up and be grateful that we're trying to save your sorry ass despite your constant logical nagging?" Ink said.

Y/N sighed in pity. Guess they have no other choice. They strangled Horror with their legs and catapulted him to the ground. After a few punches, they ran with his axe and threw it at Ink. He dodged it and yelled "Hey!"

"I'm free, so let's go!" Y/N said.

Dream made a portal this time and dragged Ink, Blue, and Y/N with him. It was when Nightmare stepped in and noticed the positivity arrows. He figured his brother got in here. "What the fuck happened in here?" He said.

"Boss..." Killer coughed. "They got Y/N from us."

"... What?"