The Fall (Madness)

Chap. 15 - The Letter

When I heard the horn, i think my heart stopped for a minute. I watched as her body fell to the ground.

I ran... I ran as fast as I could.

"Bella! Bella! Please answer me" I screamed. I checked her pulse, if she still was alive.

I couldn't hear any heartbeats .

This isn't real ... It can't be!

I started to breath heavily.

"Bella! Come on! Answer me! Open your eyes" I started shaking her.

"Someone call 911!" the driver said

"She's fine. She's going to be okay..!"

"Are you crazy?! She's dying..."

Then, it hit me.

Her head was covered in blood

-------------------

I walked slowly near her.

"You look so beautiful, as always" I said to her.

"I miss you! I miss your kisses! I miss your love!"

"I want you back Bella!" And I placed the flowers next to her.

For a moment, I thought I saw her... but it was just an illusion. She's never coming back to me...

I saw the words that I wrote on her stone "Now, when i look at the starts, you'll be there to guide me".

I left her grave and I jumped on my motorcycle. I found myself driving to our place, her favorite place 'Port Campbell'.

Walking near the sea. It was such a peaceful place. I never asked her why was her favourite. Maybe because of the birds. Maybe it was the sea she loved... As i was thinking and looking at the horizont, I saw something moving underwater.

I went near it... It was a dolphin. He was stuck in the sand.

"Hey there buddie! You stuck?! Let me help you!' I helped him, but he didn't let me go. He grabbed my T-shirt and dragged me into the water. Was this a sign? From Her?

I didn't think it twice. I let go of the dolphin and climbed to the nearest cliff.

I felt my blood running through my veins. 1... 2... 3...

I jumped

Water was all over my body... I tried to reach for something to hold on, I found the dolphin. I gave him a nod ...

And we both drowned deeper and deeper... To her.

****

I woke up from my own scream... again.
Troy ran ti me.

"You okay, dude?"

"Yeh yeh, I'm Fine. It's just a dream... again!" It took me soemtime to find our where I was.
Uncle Ben has found me again.
"Please leave me sometime alone."
"Okay." he approved "If you need anyone, just call my name." Troy left the room, never leaving my eyes.
I opened the notebook, that was under my pillow. My secret safe place. And then memories of the recent days came through my mind. So many memories...

Me and that manager dude fought really bad. Everything was destroyed. Everyone, now, knew about the "fake marriage" thing. My family was destroyed. The only solution for them was to leave me behind, and ran away to save themselves. My "so called" parents left me at my uncle, Ben, whom i didn't know that even existed. He gave me food, a place to stay.
Basically I told Troy the whole story. "The Ugly Truth." I guess i needed to get furious at someone. But it was really werid, how it turned up... I was expecting punching, and screams and blood, but instead he hugged me. He was shocked too. We became friends. Not being loved by your own family... that's what kept us together so far.

As i got up, I thought about her ... Her glamours smile... How her hair flipped when the wind howled... When she teased me... When she kissed me for the first time.
A tear rolled down my face, as my sight was focused on the old old notebook. How delicate it was. The Notebook... The only one with the secrets of a lifetime. The only one that would never change...
I placed my hand in the nearest shelf. My hand touched something unusual. My sight moved to the an envelope. I grabbed it and placed on the ground, as i sat on the cold floor.

-No Name-
-No Adress-

"Dear Cam,

I didn't think that this time would come. You are the love of my life. The tears are rolling, while I wrie this letter.
Why is it always ike this? Does it always have to end like this? Couldn't reality be more kind to us?

People,..hope,... this s what keeps us alive.

I wonder would there be life, if hope didn't exist?

Ups and downs.. Do you remember the ferris wheel? When you took me there, and held my hand tight? Cos you were scared. Or when you read to me those poems?... Do you remember when we first said 'I Love You'?... These are the little things that fulled my life with joy. I never regret loving you. I love you so damn much.

But except happiness, life comes with sacrifices. What I've already done is one of them? It's for your own good.
You can't live happily in the future, if the past is still haunting you. So you go and find your sister. I'll leave. But we may stil be together... I will be waiting.
Always&Forever.

YOURS, BELLA.

As I red the letter, I felt like i've already lost my battle. I felt so weak there... in the cold ground. Alone, trembling, ... shaking.
This is the price...the price of loving someone?
In my knees as I already was, crying like a kid who lost his precious toy.
The window was open adn the wind was howling. The blue room was actually decorated very nicely. A shelf...a bed... and this broken heart boy crying his heart out. That boy was me.

As angry as I was, I got on my foot grabbed a vase and smashed it on the wall. I screamed like never before.... And i stopped... tired.

'This isn't the end...my end.' I ran to the window "WHERE IS OUR ALWAYS&FOREVER...UH..TELL ME! FREAKING TALK... WHERE? WHERE?"
I turned around to see her. And there she stand. Calm. Beautiful. Smiling.

'Cameron, that ws my end. Go and find yours.'

'Bella" i said and run towards her, but she dissapeard in a touch of our hands.

That was the time when my uncle came in.

"Cameron!"

-No Reponse-

"Cameron!" he repeated himself, but I was focused on the empty space, where Bella stood two seconds ago. But I could still see her smile, fading slowly. My mind could never let o of that view, and my heart coul never let go of her love.

"CAMERON!" he shaked me. "SON, What are you doing?"

"She sacrificed herself for me..." i looked at him in the eyes.

For a moment even he couldn't find the words. "Why are you here then?"

And I understood. This is the end, Bella was telling me.
The end of the past, and the begging of something new.

'I have to go...! " i smiled and patted him in the back.

I grabbed my notebook and my backpack. Headed t the door, I stopped to say my final words.

"Uncle... Thank you!" And i dissapeared .