If I Try (Lesbian Story)

Life Is A Highway

"The beautiful journey of today can only begin when we learn to let go of yesterday."
-Steve Maraboli

Feeling the wind blow against my face was freeing. The wind was more powerful than the tears that fell. It dried them instantly on impact so the tears eventually stopped within the first few hours of my little escapade. I found out the more I rode, the less I had time to feel, at least the pain. My mind drank in the scenery as I passed. I could feel the tension in my neck subsiding ever so lightly, little by little. I couldn't say the same for the pieces of my heart, but at least they weren't continually crumbling. I guess they were in a free fall like balls in the lottery game just bouncing around with no rhyme or reason. I decided that since it seemed like the more I rode, the better I became, I would make my little adventure last awhile. I had always wanted to go to Washington, D.C. and look at all the important shit around there. So, that's where I was going first.

I don't know about you, but for me, I couldn't really drive for more than nine hours straight without my legs going stiff and hurting like a mother fucker. Taking this into account I decided to stop seven hours into my trip in Savannah Georgia. There's a lot of history here. I found a hotel to stay at and decided I would walk around for a little bit to stretch my legs. I found this kick ass bar and grill within walking distance. I decided to fill my stomach up and get completely trashed. The next morning I woke up, still in my clothes but hey, I was proud that I made it back to the hotel. I took a shower and got back on the road. Eight hours later I made it to D.C. I found a place to stay and then did all the typical tourist sightseeing. It was pretty cool learning about our nations history again. At least it gave me more information that I could try and obsess over instead of my impending breakdown that seemed to be around every corner. I ended up staying there a couple of days hitting all of the museums and monuments. The third day I decided to drive to Philadelphia because it was only two and a half hours away. I walked the really neat old streets and found yet another place to stay. The next morning I got up and saw the liberty bell and all the old buildings and historic sights that Philly had to offer. Of course, I had to try the original Philly cheesesteak sandwich, which was awesome. Afterwards I felt like I did all the damage I could and headed to Pittsburg.

Pittsburg was ok, but it wasn't as cool as Washington or Philly was. From there I went to mount Vernon Indiana. I've never actually been to Indiana. I'm not really that impressed either. Needless to say, I only stayed there long enough to eat, drink and sleep. From Mount Vernon I rode to Wichita Kansas. I rode around seeing the fresh tornado wreckage. It would suck to live here, with all these tornadoes that could come at any time. From Wichita I rode into Colorado Springs. Now this is what I'm taking about. It's absolutely beautiful here. Only thing is, is that it's freezing. I wish my little journey could have been in the springtime instead of late October. I've never seen the mountains though. There is something so majestic about them. I found a little cabin in the mountains that I could rent for a couple of days, and decided to rest here for a little while. I was sitting on the porch in an old rocking chair curled up in a blanket drinking some coffee. It really was breathtakingly beautiful here. You could even see snow on some of the tops of the mountains. You could see the puffy clouds hovering over some of the taller ones. It's almost as if they were huge chimneys and the clouds were the smoke that was escaping from the tip top. You could see what I'm assuming were Eagles soaring over the trees. I could also hear some kind of creek or river gushing in the distance. This was peaceful. No one was around, I'm all alone, there aren't any distractions, a perfect place to just be.

It was gorgeous and completely beautiful I stayed there for a week. I hiked all kinds of trails, and even went fly fishing. That was different. I can't make fun of the people on TV or movies anymore for doing that. At night I would have enormous break downs. So to calm myself, or really, just try to numb myself I would just drink until I passed out. I know it's a shitty and stupid thing to do, but it was the only thing that worked. I had a bad feeling too, I knew I was taking the easy way out, but I didn't care. I know if the people back home knew they would kick my ass. Did I just think of the people back home? I'm an idiot, I don't have a home anymore. I would start thinking of the people I love and that would lead me to start thinking about her. That would lead to straight up chugging a bottle of jack, or tequila, or Bacardi, or grappa, or vodka. That was one of the problems, beer wouldn't cut it anymore. In just a short amount of time I went from beer to the hard shit. I couldn't even believe it myself. At least I wasn't doing it while I was actually driving though. That would be hella stupid.