Romeo and Juliet| l.h

[eleven: are you okay? no.]

TW: body dysmorphia

On a Tuesday morning in the Gilmore shack, Winona lays in bed, staring up at the ceiling. She can't help but feel out of place in her room, her home, and her own body. Since the age of thirteen Winona has constantly beat herself up, all because of her body.

She can't help but compare herself to Rory. The twin who is skinnier and smaller, while she lays in bed curvy and taller. She can't help but think about how in the movies girls are skinny with big breasts, an hourglass figure, and a nice ass. Though she may have nice tits, she can't help but berate herself for them.

"Boys like smaller breasts"

"Boys don't like when you have such big curves"

"They'll eventually leave you"

She'd like to blame her mother for her trust and abandonment issues, but in reality she knows it's her own mind fucking with her. She's never come out about it though, scared that Lorelai will tell her she's gorgeous and shoudln't worry about her body. And though she would love to hear those words, they wouldn't actually help.

Wiping the tears from her eyes, she gets up and stands in front of the mirror that lays on her wall, close to the currently open door. Taking off her pajama top, leaving her in just a sports bra, she runs her hands over her waist and stomach, pulling at the fat that stands out. She tends to do this on random mornings, at times she wakes up happy and full of love for herself, hile on other mornings she can't help but stand in front of this standing mirror.

Turning her head she sees Rory standing in the hallway, watching her with her mouth open. With no emotion she walks over to the door and shuts it, not wanting Rory to see her like this. She continues to walk over to the chair in her room, and curls up on it, no wanting to be there at the moment.

♥♥♥♥

Around two hours later, she finally gets up and about, applying some concealer, blush, chapstick and mascara onto a freshly cleaned face, and brushes through her knotty hair. Walking over to her closet she pulls out overalls with s unflower on them and a white knitted sweater, since it's still fall.

She walks out of her room, and down the stairs, right past a confused Rory. She grabs her bookbag and phone off the kitchen table and runs outside.

"Winona! Wait Winona!" She ignores her mother's calls and continues her way to the onl place she feels comfortable at right now.

♥♥♥♥

After a ten minute walk, she makes it to the Stars Hollow bridge. She sits down and pulls out the cigratte box from her front pocket, and lights on, placing it in between her lips, inhaling and exhaling. She continues this process until she hears a pair of sneakers walking towads her.

She had stopped smoking after Lorelai caught her at the young age of fifteen, but it comes out sometimes when she feels down.

"Winnie?"

Turning her head she meets eyes with Jess, "Hey Jess." He sits down next to her and takes the cigarette she was offering, "You okay?"

"No"

"Okay."

The two conntinue to sit there and watch the birds fly through the trees and sky. They continue to kick their feet back and forth, watching their reflections in the water, "I'm here for you, if you need."

Winona turns to the Mariano boy, "Thank you Jess."

♥♥♥♥♥
685 words

Hey y'all. I know this chapter was a lot, mentally. Believe me it was for me as well. I haven't been diagnosed with anything but I do hear similar thoughts run through my mind, and wanted to show that Winona has a lot going on throughout her head everyday.

I hope anybody that is having thoughts like those, or any other harmful thoughts knows they can message me here on Wattpad, or also on my tiktok: rktwattpad

Have a nice day everyone <3

(This is what she was wearing)

(And this is her room)