Silent Screams // WILBUR SOOT ANGST // SBI ADOPTION AU

(58)

Days passed agonisingly slow.

What once were April showers had turned into storms leaving a grey tone to the usually white clouds, Tommy thought the grey storm clouds reminded him of Wilburs smoke. He thought about the strong winds and was reminded of Technos built up yet unpredictable anger. He thought about the heavy raindrops and wondered if it was raining for Wilbur too, wherever he was.

All in all it only circled back to the same question - when would the storm fade into sunny days where his only worry was whether he would be allowed to play under the suns rays past dinner time?

A few times Tubbo would come over, and the days would be much brighter, but he would ask why Techno was shaking so much or why he was throwing up for the fourth time or when he had started talking to himself again and Tommy couldn't bring himself to tell him it was withdrawals. So he settled for continuous excuses, while Techno longed for any kind of release that he could only dream of getting his hands on again.

But today, the clouds were almost black & the rain didn't stop when Eret showed up with an apologetic smile sickening Tommy & Techno to their stomachs - it was the same one that she gave when Wilbur left.

"Oh, Eret? I wasn't expecting you, come in! come in!" Phil greeted as he quickly stepped back allowing Eret to escape the storm from outside, the hint of worry in his voice didn't fall on deaf ears though.
"Hi, Philza. It's always good to see you, I just wanted to do a check up on Ranboo if that's alright?"Phils shoulders fell back as he felt his body untense - he didn't have to let go again. Not yet, anyway.
"Of course it is, he's just in the front room with Tommy & Techno." Phil explained as he lead the way, the 3 gave Ranboo and Eret their space..

"Ranboo! How are you?" Eret asked gently as Ranboo shrugged simply,
"g-good, I g-guess. I don't k-know, why?" Eret furrowed his eyebrows,
"you guess?"

Ranboo thought back to Techno, what did it mean to be on edge around someone because all you could think about was the way their firsts naturally curled into themselves before he striked? Or why it was so easy for him to get mad... how easy it was for him to punch his brother.. how Tommy flinched whenever Techno would go to ruffle his hair or anything.

"I j-just meant y-yeah." Ranboo replied bluntly, for a minute (but if you asked Ranboo he would've told you it was longer) nobody spoke.
"Are you sure? You seem abit dow-"
"I'm s-sure." Eret just sighed again before nodding,
"what if I told you that I recently had a message from an uncle of yours?"

Ranboo swallowed the lump in his throat.

"My a-answer would've s-stayed t-the same." He spoke through a dry throat & a dishonest mindset. Eret eyed him carefully,
"and you're sure about that? It would still have to be a couple of months before he's even allowed to start seeing you, again. It's worth thinking about." Eret smiled sadly while Ranboo thought about Philza..

..he was nice. He was definitely a father figure, but he was Tommys' & Technos' biological dad, he saw the automatic connection between them all despite everything else. It was something he would never have if he stayed, he would never have a connection with his own biological family if he never gave them another chance. But he didn't want to give people second chances when they didn't deserve it. Even if he forgets most of what had actually happened, the haunting remained as a feeling he could never quite put his finger on.

"I'll t-think about i-it." Ranboo admitted, he could almost feel Tommy's anger when he finds out. Ranboo had never even met Wilbur, but he found himself trying to fill his shoes.. trying to make up for the fact he was 'just Ranboo'.

Ranboo stayed put on the edge of the sofa when Eret left, he felt like 2 different people - he wished he was 2 different people. Maybe one of them could stay with his uncle and he could remain here, where he already knew it was safe.

As Eret left, Ranboo sat on the edge of the sofa - but Tommy was in the room within seconds.
"You're leaving?!" He half-shouted, sour tears threatening to spill. Ranboo questioned what he was feeling, anger? betrayal? nostalgia?

Ranboo shuffled in his seat,
"n-no."

He didn't sound too sure.

"Do you promise that you won't leave me?" Tommys voice broke as he stared at the boy with a sour expression, watching his every move.
"Y-Yeah, promise."

He sounded even less sure this time.

"Would y-you ever d-do drugs?" Ranboo questioned thinking back to when he overheard Phil and Techno arguing about it, but this time it was Tommys turn to sound unsure.

"No."

It was all he grew up around, watching Techno go through it all and seeing a brief glimpse of Wilbur going through it. You'd think his answer would be a strong no, a certain promise that he would never follow down that path.

But curiosity kills the cat.

***

Wilbur watched as the car came to a stop outside a yellow house, it was all a blur as he climbed out behind Eret and watched a middle-aged couple open the door.
"Eret, right? And Wilbur?" The woman eventually spoke up, a sweet smile on display as she moved to the side to allow them both to come in.

Muffled words and hazy blurs were all his mind could supply for the rest of the day, he learnt their names were Liam and Rose and they had a cat but anything past that was lost on him as he sat on their leather sofa by their side.
"So, Wilbur. What type of stuff do you like watching?" Liam asked, idly scratching at his beard as he did so before passing Wilbur a phone to type on. Unlike previous foster homes, they didn't seem to be weirded out or mad that he was 'nonverbal'. 

Well, neither was Phil. He brushed off the guilt and tried to focus on the question, did he ever really even watch TV?

'I never really got a chance to watch it.' He watched the older frown slightly before nodding,
"foster systems can be dodgy. I get that, you seem like the type of person to enjoy Impractical Jokers or Family guy." Rose jokingly hit the back of Liams head, and if they noticed Wilburs' flinch they didn't comment on it.
"He's not American." Wilbur felt a faint smile tug at the corner of his lips as he watched them laugh along with eachother.

[ A/N i hope you're all doing okay<3 do you guys prefer long chapters or shorter ones? ]