Bridget's Rose Petals

Bob and Pat

7 Petals

Bob was one of my closest friends. When I needed advice I'd go to him. One time some girl was spreading rumors about me dating this really ugly guy.

Everyone knew the rumors couldn't be true because she, Pat, was a bad liar. But just to amuse you, the story goes, in her exact words:

"Hey you guys, I have a totes juicy story. You know that short emo, bipolar, brunette chick with the black hair? What's her name? Oh Bridget right? Anyway I saw her walk into the movie theater and you'll never guess who walked in after her! Bob!"

So let's pause because you may be confused. Yes, the really ugly guy who I supposedly went on a date with was my best friend. I chose to have ugly friends so I wouldn't develop any feelings for them. So now that we're clear, back to the "totes juicy story!"

Yes! Oh my god so she walked in and held the door for him and when he walked in, they went separate ways. But wait for it, their movies ended at the exact same time because they were both leaving..... AT THE SAME TIME! Oh my god so they have to be dating right?"

Yeah, she was dumb. I know. Regardless of how dumb that story is, that was all a lie anyway because I only went to the theater to take Bob his ticket which I won for him at a carnival. I never went inside.

It wasn't until later that I realized, Bob set up the whole thing. If only Pat was a better liar, people might have believed we were dating.

Pat knew me and Bob were close, and he was the most unattractive guy in my squad. She saw this as a perfect opportunity to ruin my life.

Bob only agreed because she agreed to kiss him during passing period in the hallway where everyone could see. But they didn't get the chance to do that.

As soon as I came up with a revenge plan, I didn't hesitate. You see, I came up with their names based on Sponge Bob and Patrick. They were partners in crime.

So I'm sure they didn't mind when I tied them together to an anchor. Or when I drove them to the ocean together. And I'm sure their favorite part was when I threw them in the ocean together. So they could sink all the way down to the bottom of the ocean where they belong... Together.