Poetry From The Mind Of The Loving

Without You Here

**I wrote this one a long time ago after having a really bad nightmare... I think it speaks for itself so expect feels**

Sometimes I hide away from the world, trying to stop the tears.
I can't get the voices out of my head, the yelling and the screams.
I can't see you or speak to you, the one strong point in my life.
I never realized how things would be without you here, with me.
She cries all day and I feel her pain, but I must be strong for her.
I can't cry.
I can't yell.
I can't scream.
This pain is too much to handle and the words they say burn my heart.
I can't keep the pain away, but I try with every part of my being.
You were so close to leaving and I almost lost you, my daddy.
What would I do? Who would I be?
You are everything in my life and the first man I loved.
Your harsh eyes look bitterly at the world, but soften when turned to me.
I want to tell you everything that has happened when you were gone, but I don't want to see you cry.
They yell at each other because my sister doesn't care that you're gone.
Today is mommy's birthday and she wishes you were here.
I'd give up everything to hug you and to know it'll be okay.
I'm afraid to cry for fear the tears won't stop.
I can't sleep when you're so far away from home.
I wish you were here instead of there so it would be okay.
Sometimes I wonder how things would be if we made different choices.