Im not insane, Just in love [Frerard]

AN: OK so this is my first story so you have to go easy on me. -_- Alsoi can't tell if you find this chapter really short,or kinda long or whatever the hell

Yeah.

Also I rated this PG-13because I will use some language

Not for anything sexual or of that matter

Yah nasty.....

Okay maybe if this does well and anyone asks

Maybe!

Maybe

Any who enjoy. ^-^|||

Alone.

That's how I've spent most of my life, alone. When I was little I didn't really care it seemed so normal I didnt realize how much I actually hated it. But it was my first day of kindergarden everyone had friends, EVERYONE. They where all conversing and laughing like it was so normal, and I was just alone again. It seems pretty drastic for a six year old but I was depressed, and by second grade being known as the "loner" started to irritate me. So i made him. I knew it wasn't odd for kids to have imaginary friends, sure I was a bit old but I just needed someone to talk too

I counted it 2 weeks I have been silent, there was never a need for me to talk.

I don't know how I thought of him, how I decided what he would look like, how he would act like. I even gave him a voice and he was just there. It felt weird having thought of all this staring at something you know isn't there but, its just so clear he even blinked and moved his chest slightly indicating breathing.

I smiled at how genius my imaginary friend turned out to be, but it wasn't what I expected at first we didn't talk but he just followed me around every, sometimes it was annoying. He would sit on my desk in class and complelty obscure my view. Sometimes he would poke at my food, not indicating a mark or anything but it was still touched. I never ate that part.

4 weeks silent I need to make him talk

I was in my room coloring a picture in my art book, a monkey or something. I made him red.

I stared at my bed where he was just sitting watching me, I was happy with how I "designed" him per say. He had black hair just like me but his was a little long, and somewhere in my process I gave him hazel eyes, I didn't even know what color hazel was before I saw his eyes. I stood and walked the small space from my desk to my bed and just stared at him,considering he wasn't real his blank expression was really impressive, I finally gave in.

"What's your name" I whispered praying he would answer back (I've only heard him talk once, I kinda wanted to listen again)

"You never gave me one, or am I naming myself?"

Oh thats right I never did name him. But I didn't want to name him he was my only friend what if i gave him a bad name. Or I gave him a amazing name and someone I hated just so happened to have his name. I would come to hate him too

"Youre not gonna have a name" I said "I'll just call you friend"

He smiled and nodded

I gave him a good smile too

*Sixth grade*

By this time I knew I was seriously screwed up. My mother found out about my friend and thought I was insane, she took me to a therapist that tried to make me forget him but I wouldn't. I was still alone without him, but I finally cracked when they put me in solitary confinement, white upon white and not even tiles to count on the floor, I gave in and tonight was the night I had to forget.

I sat on my bed. The moon slightly lightning my room I stared at the pills in my hand

"These are special pills the first night you take them your halutinations become blury and by the second week, you remember barely anything" the doctors words hurt, but where slightly releiving knowing I wouldn't completely forget him. I just couldn't ever see or hear him.

I looked at the mop of black hair below me sitting on the floor, his hair has gotten longer almost shoulder length. I drew the line at imaginary hair cuts

"So" he finally looked up at me "What do you wanna talk about"

I couldn't think about anything, what's so important to talk about right now

I let out a sigh "life" I murmered " I wanna talk about life"

He gave me a weird look "well that seems a bit too serious for you"

"I just wanna know you view of it, being...." I couldn't say it, fake,imaginary,not real. It just hurt too much, the only person I had was-

"A figment of your imagination" he blurted out

That one stung the most

"Yeah, that" I could've swore I was about to cry, but it just made me feel even more insane.

"Well" he stretched forward and climbed on my bed "I never really thought about it, didnt think it was neccesary" he looked at me probably seeing the sadness in my faial expression

He just sighed "What do you think about life?"

What did i think about life? Guess I never thought about it either "I think its weird when people complain about life being hard, how depressed it gets you. But I would be worse if we knew everything to life, if we found out the secret to perfection life would be even worse. Knowing every single thing that's going to happen would make you even more depressed, there's no excitement anymore so why bother. In fact I prefer life hard" I took a breath and laid down on my bed burying my face in the pillows, gripping my pills in my hand

"I think your the smartest person in the world, and I'm going to miss that but you have to get better now. I don't want to make you insane"

I poped the little capsules in my mouth cringing at the taste, I looked up and he was gone, nowhere.

And i couldn't remember what color his eyes where.

I put my head down against my pillow and closed my eyes

"Goodnighy, friend"

"Goodbye, Frank"