Stolen hearts

25

"Sometimes I fell numb. Like my whole body." Me and Zane were lying under his skylight. Apollo was passed out somewhere. Me and Zane lost never have I ever, but we were still drunk. I have no clue why I just told him that. Maybe it's because he was so close to me. It just felt right.

"What do you mean?" Zane rolled onto his side. Now facing me. My eyes didn't leave the stars though.

"I don't know. It's just like nothing matters and I can't feel anything." Zane was still staring at me. His eyes understanding. Maybe I'm not alone. If I tell him maybe he will understand.

"Bentley I don't know how you feel. But I'm here for you. You can believe me, and tell me anything."

Can I really. What would he do if he knew my dad was out. Would he stay with me if he knew. Knew how broken I really was. How I think about my mother all the time. Or how if I could go back I would have my life be taken and not hers. How I'm so lost.

"Zane I'm falling and I can't get back. I'm not the girl everyone thinks I am. I act like everything's fine. But I'm the broken pieces on the floor. That people step over and hope that they will somehow disappear."

I can't look at him. I know if I do I will loose everything. I won't have the courage to hold in my tears that I have tried so hard to hold in. Zane doesn't say anything. I know he's there. I can hear his breaths.

Zane wraps his arm around me. "I will sweep you up and put you back together. No matter how scared you are. Bentley even if you don't see it. I love you. I will always love you!"

I turn and put my head in his chest. He embraces me. I feel the numbness fade. I feel the heat of his body.

"I love you Zane. But I'm afraid to loose you!" Zane stiffens. He lifts my chin up so I'm looking up into his eyes.

"And why would you loose me?"

"I loose everyone I love!"

I rest my head on his forehead our eyes centimeters apart. It's the truth. I loved my father. Look what he did to me. I loved my mother. She's dead. I love him. I would die if I lost him. I can't loose him.

"I'm not easy to get rid of. No matter how hard you try." A tear slid down my cheek. He swiped it away with his thumb. He dipped his head down so our lips were almost together.

"I won't try at all!"

"I'm going to kiss you Bentley!" It was a comment not a question. His lips made mine tingle. Like thousand of little fairies were dancing on them. We broke apart.

"And you Zane I'm going to make love to you. Not sex but love!" Zane smiled at me and swooped me up in his arms and carried me to the bed.

Let me tell you love is much better than sex. The way our bodies fit together like perfect puzzle pieces. How gentle it was. Not hungry and needing. How it was only us there. How it felt like it was only us on earth. How my heart aches every time I look at him. Like it might explode with so much emotions. That is what love is like.

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I woke up to sunlight streaming through the window. Zane was laying next to me. Sleeping steadily. I slowly got out of bed. The floorboards creaked with the weight of my body shifting about then. I looked over at Zane to make sure that I have not woken him up. Nope.

I made my way down the steps. Only to find Apollo passed out upside down on them. Ha loser he is going to be hurting when he wakes up. I looked at the clock to see that it was already 11:42. Should I call April. Nah I barley see her. Plus she probable knows that I'm here. It's common sense. I'm not there then I'm here.