The F5 (Fraternal Five)

Lose

TW: mention of suicide attempt

Later that night, when the party is in full swing, Off takes Gun outside to take a breather. It's getting stuffy in there, as the rest of the gang make it their mission to get him and Tay wasted before the clock strikes midnight. In other circumstances, he would enjoy being one of the men of the moment. But he isn't in the right headspace right now, and all he wants is celebrating his success with some peace (and the right company).

To his surprise, Gun complies without a fight, settling with holding hand as they take a stroll along the quiet part of the beach. Off appreciates it so; he likes it when Gun is obedient. They find a good spot to sit down and Gun immediately snuggles close to him. Off feels his heart so full it's about to burst.

"What is it with you?" Off chuckles. "You don't usually pass up a chance to party."

"Neither do you, Papii."

"I'm a changed man, remember?" Off attempts a joke.

But Gun doesn't find it funny. "Does love take the fun out of you?" There's bitterness in his voice.

"Teacup, what??? Where did that come from???" When Gun doesn't answer, Off cups his face in his hands. "Hey, seriously, what is it? Am I boring you?"

"I asked you a question. And please don't put words into my mouth." Gun's tone is soft, but he sounds so distant. And just like that, Off's mood drops.

"Of course not. I ...." I, what? Off trails off as he can't come up with anything.

Gun offers a sad smile. "Do you think I won't notice? That you've been giving Win the evil eye?"

"Gun ...." Off is once again left with no excuse.

"I was just calling him to ask about the bouquet he got for his mom. Saw it on Instagram the other day and it's so pretty, I thought of buying you one. As for the rest of it, it's really not my story to tell. But you really need to stop coming at my friends, okay? You never have a single thing to worry about, I promise."

"So Pak is one of your friends now?" Off curses himself the moment the words leave his mouth.

Gun winces. Quietly, he asks, "Are you seriously picking a fight with me again?"

"No!" Off recoils immediately. "No, Gun, I'm just—"

But Gun has already turned away, frozen to the spot as he finds Bright and Win standing awkwardly within earshot.

"Nongs!" Gun recovers with a forced smile. "What's up?"

"You know what never mind, it can wait!" Win laughs nervously, dragging Bright away from the brewing storm.

"No, it's okay. We're done here." Gun gets up, tone final.

Off stares at Gun in disbelief, but the latter never returns the gaze.

Win nervously glances between the two of them as tensions rise. Eventually, he gives in to Gun's pleading eyes. "P'Gun, uh, I know my timing sucks but can we maybe talk?"

"Yes, Win, of course." Gun shoots Win a grateful look as he approaches the huge nong. Win gingerly pats Gun's tiny shoulder for emotional support, though it was short-lived under Off's death glare.

"Wait, Gun—"

"Let's talk later, Papii." Gun cuts off with a small smile, then walks away without waiting for Off's answer. Win wais the remaining guys and hurries to join him.

Left with only the two of them, Bright sports a weak smile. "I know it's stupid but uh, you okay, Phi?"

"Let's just go back." Off stands up abruptly and heads straight for the bar.

Bright sighs. "Welp. Nice talk."

*

"I'm always later." Off scoffs, bitter as the alcohol that makes him run his mouth.

Sitting down next to him, Bright orders a drink before taking in the state Off's in. "Phi ... um ... you don't look okay."

"No shit Sherlock."

Bright grimaces. "You should really talk to P'Gun, Phi."

"Later, remember?" Off snorts. "Fuck, what difference does it make anyway? I can't."

"What?" There's no answer, so Bright presses on, "Why?"

For a second, his confident senior looks uncertain. And it's borderline disturbing; unlike Tay, who excels in almost everything, Off is average in comparison. But if there's one quality Off has that Tay doesn't, it's that he's always been so certain of his actions. Of himself.

Until today.

"I'm scared ... no, terrified ... that he'll get tired of me—if not already. Ha! He used to be my comfort person, now look at me! Always have to tread carefully around him." Off turns to Bright, eyes somber and miserable. "Tell me, Bright, where did I go wrong?"

"Phi .... You know—"

"On second thought, don't answer it." Off waves his hand, cutting Bright short. "I know where. I just can't help it." That I've developed some feelings. Feelings, that Gun doesn't want.

"P'Off, that's ...." Bright trails off. Unhealthy, he grimaces, finding the right word, but decides on keeping it to himself.

Off looks over to Bright as the latter stops mid-sentence. "What is it? Just give it to me straight, I can handle it."

"I don't know .... It's really not my place to say ...." Bright hesitates, knowing there's nothing good coming from what he's about to say.

"Fuck it! Just tell me!" Off growls.

"You're losing yourself P'Off, is he worth it?" Bright blurts it out in one breath. Welp, leaving things as they are won't do them any good either, or so he convinces himself.

Off is stunned for a good minute by the wake up call. Then, he scoffs. "It doesn't matter. I love him too much I might as well kill myself if he ever left me. I'm losing either way." He finishes his drink in one go. "Oh fuck it, can't he pretend to love me even just for a second?! Why am I even in a relationship I'm not happy with, fuck me."

Well, at least he's aware.

"Bright? May I borrow your P'Off for a sec?"

A voice cuts in, and Bright turns around, ready to turn down whomever that is. Though all words escape him the moment he recognizes the guy. "...P'Oab?"

Off spins around at the mention of Gun's onscreen partner's name.

"Hello. Nice to finally meet you, Phi." Oab offers a friendly smile.

Off doesn't smile back.

Bright looks between the two and hurriedly interferes. "Uh ... sorry, P'Oab, but my phi is a bit—"

"Please? It's about Gun. As his friend, I really need to set some things straight. With you." Oab looks straight into Off's eyes, his expression sincere, tone nowhere near aggressive.

"Uh ...." Bright hesitates.

You really need to stop coming at my friends, okay?

"Yeah, whatever. Let's talk." Off shrugs getting off. Bitterly realizing that with Gun, he's never in control.

But Bright quickly stops him. "No, stay. I'll be around."

"Fuck off! I'm not some damsel in distress, you bastard!" Off curses, though his eyes are grateful, as Bright walks away chuckling.

A/N OffBright crumbs because ✨Astrophile✨ lol