Willa

Chapter Thirty Three: Burning bridges

Allie had spent a while trying to cover my love bite for me before the family dinner on the second night. Her closeness once again was becoming a little confronting. I couldn't be close with her like that a moment longer, not if I wanted to remain sane.

"Willa" Allie argues, sensing my retreat "I don't think it's covered enough...let me just finish it" she asked, but I kept walking towards the wardrobe.

I pulled off my sweats and chucked them on the floor. "Oh" she says hesitantly realising as she follows me, that I am half naked. "Sorry" she excused, moving onto the balcony and away from me.

I pull on the pretty dress I had picked for tonight, it allows a small slice of flesh at my waist to be seen. My own little slice of rebellion.
"Done" I call, sweeping my dark hair over one shoulder.

"Wow" she offers, reentering the room. She looks me up and down. "You look fantastic" she says quietly, and she smiles.

I feel the full force of love she shows. "Thank you" I reply, in the same vain.

"Let's go" she says as she leads the way out of the hotel room, collecting family members along the way as we head to the elevators.

Morgan appears "Willa... wow babe" she says taking my arm and kissing my lips.

Allie throws a look as she, Ben, and Harper get into the elevator before us. I wave them on as the lift is full and the doors shut. Charlotte and my dad join us, waiting, and then Brigham and Byron with their wives. "Are the kids not coming" I ask, noting their absence.

"The older kids are already waiting downstairs with mom, and the littles have babysitters. We thought it might be nice to do an adults dinner tonight." My dad revealed. "With all of our own grown babies" he says putting his arms around my shoulders and kissing my forehead "you being our littlest" he whispers with a smile.

Charlotte throws me daggers, and Morgan's hand tightens on my arm in response. I gulp as Charlottes gaze falls to my neck and her eyes bulge. She reaches out quickly and grabs my arm firmly.

"Willa" she chastises, and she pulls me away to a corner by a window that looks out over the beautiful view "you cannot come down there with that on your neck" she states.

My fingers rise instinctively to the spot she is looking at. "Charlotte it's nothing" I reply, looking back to all of the eyes that are now fixed on us.

A bell rings and my dad calls us "come on girls we are going to be late" he says, as the family walk into the elevator. Morgan waits for me, eyeing Charlotte suspiciously.

"Daddy come here" Charlotte urges, and my dad does.

He walks over in his linen shirt and cargo trousers and he looks down at us both "what is going on" he whispers.

Charlotte grabs my shoulder and pulls me towards him, her finger poised and pointing at my neck "daddy tell her she cannot come to a family dinner in this state"

My dad looks at my neck, and then to me, and the disappointment I see in his large brown eyes is enough to break a daughters heart.
"Willa" he finally acknowledges "what is that" he asks.

I stand completely still, wanting to disappear and be anywhere but here, knowing what was coming.

"I'm so sorry" Morgan says hearing and coming to my aide, but in reality, making it so much worse "I didn't realise I had left a mark" she revealed.

My father looked disgusted "Willa stay here please" he asked me.

I nodded, feeling a sting of tears behind my eyes as he walked away and joined the family in the elevator.

Charlotte turned to me before following him "Just grow up Willa" she pleaded.

I felt a sob catch there in my throat, as my eyes glazed over with the tears that threatened to spill.

"I'm so sorry" Morgan begged as the elevator doors closed.

I ran, as fast as I could back to my room. I shut the door and slipped to the floor, and for the first time in years I felt the heavy weight of their judgement ...and the truth. I would never truly escape it... not really. They wouldn't change and neither would I. We were at an impasse.

***
My phone pinged, a message from my dad

"Willa, I've never been so disappointed with you. Please cover that up before we see you tomorrow. How can we even look at you when you behave this way"

***

"Please open up Willa" Morgan begged.

I had been on the floor of my hotel room for ten minutes. I finally dragged myself up the wall, unlatching the door and allowing her entry. "I'm so sorry" she said remorsefully pulling me into her arms "Willa please forgive me"

She didn't need to ask for forgiveness, because no part of me blamed Morgan for the bridges that were currently burning. "I don't need to forgive you... I love you, and that wasn't your fault"

"I can't do this anymore with them... I need to leave" I say, removing myself from her arms.

I busily pulled luggage out of the closet, throwing it on the bed as she looked on, not knowing what to do, and as clothes flew across the room landing in the bag she walked across the room and pulled me back against herself. Her hands run down my hair, forcing me to stop for a second, and it was all it took for sobs to take hold and make me feel like I was about to split in two.

"Are you sure you want to go" she whispered.

I nod into her chest "I won't stay here another second... I'm over pretending with them. They will never see me or accept me for me, not truly...and keeping me in their life by inviting me on the odd family trip just to settle their conscience so that they can sleep at night, it isn't helping" I say loudly, pulling away from her and continuing to throw all my belongings in the bag. "Morgan if I don't leave I might just fall apart, and it won't be pretty...please take me home" I beg.

She nods and helps me to pack, gathering my bathroom essentials and all of the little things I usually forgot, before we emptied the room. It was like I had never even been here at all. I moved everything into her room, before we vacated the hotel, all within an hour of that fateful moment.

I wouldn't see my family all together again for an incredibly long time. I would eventually speak to my mom again, and have a small communication with my father, but for the most part, the next ten years were spent away from them. For my own mental health... I let the bridges succumb to the flame.