The Tale of Two Lukes

Chapter 12: Tall Luke's Adventures in Exile Part 1

September 4, 2021,
Dear Journal,
I would like to start off this entry by saying that this is NOT a diary, this is a JOURNAL. Diaries are for prissy sissy girls while journals are for manly man men like me. I am NOT a prissy sissy girl. GET THAT STRAIGHT!!!!
It has been three days since I was exiled. I'm doing pretty good on food and water at the moment, but it is getting pretty hot. I have no clue how far I've walked or where I am though. There's nothing but desert around me. I think I'm walking south? I don't know...
Not much has happened over these past three days other than me walking and thinking. What am I thinking about? Many things. Mainly how Luke can hate me so much? I thought we were friends. I thought it was cool that we shared the same name, but he doesn't think so. I did SO much for him too! I made him a peanut butter sandwich, but apparently it's "dangerous" and "inconsiderate" to give someone food they're highly allergic to. I invited him to my Batman themed birthday party, but apparently that's "childish" and "stupid". I even let him to first during auditions, but apparently that "made him nervous." I don't understand! I was so nice to him, and this is his thanks?! I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!!!!
On a lighter side, I made friends with a raccoon named Delirious Barbossus Edward Smithons III. What happened to Delirious Barbossus Edward Smithons I and II? I don't know... I tried asking him, but he won't tell me... I think it was too traumatizing for him to tell...
Delirious and I had a good dinner. We had some cheese, meat, and crackers. It tasted good. Delirious couldn't figure out how to make a meat and cheese cracker sandwich though. I think he's a little slow, but that's ok. I love him either way.
We decided to camp out somewhere. I set up a tent and a sleeping bag. I'm currently in the tent, and Delirious is outside looking for food (fatass). It's been a good day, all things considered.