Letters

To the guy I rejected

A letter to the guy I rejected...

I want you to know that rejecting you was not easy.

Rejecting your feelings for me wasn't easy. I didn't did it because I'm heartless, I did it because that's what I feel for you.

Pure friendship.

I didn't see you as someone; I didn't see you the way you saw me.

And I'm sorry.

I didn't know what to say to you that day you told me about your feelings, I couldn't find the right words about what should I say next. So I remained silent. We both remained silent, and that moment, I saw the pain that crossed in your eyes.

I saw how hurt you were when I didn't said a word.

I saw you.

I'm sorry because I couldn't return your love to me. I'm sorry because I hurt your ego, because I caused so much pain to you. Sorry because I was the reason why you're crying every time you're alone.

Sorry for making you feel worthless, like a piece of shit.

Sorry for ignoring the flowers and chocolates that you would always give me just to show how important I am to your life.

Sorry for not noticing you when all you did was stay by my side.

I saw how hurt you were when you found out that I am in love with someone else, someone who didn't loved me the way you did.

I swear I wish that it was you, I wish that it was you who I saw first.

I'm sorry for all the pain and heartaches I caused. Sorry for destroying your heart.

You are special to me, and I appreciate your efforts. I appreciate all the letters, the texts of encouragements, the handkerchiefs, the notes, the roses. I appreciate the umbrellas, I appreciate the way you carefully hold my things and me.

I appreciate the songs you sang for me, I appreciate your tears for me. Your words. Your promises.

But I can't.

I couldn't let your hopes up, because you know that I'm not that kind of person. I don't want to give false impressions. I don't want to give you hope because that'll done more harm.

I want you to know that you are worth it, but I'm not the person who deserve your attention, your love.

You will find someone better.

Someone who will see your worth. Someone who will love you back, unconditionally. You will find her someday.

I'm sorry for rejecting your honest feelings for me. But it's better this way than give you hopes.

You deserve to be happy with someone who will look at you the same way as you look at her.

Thank you for everything.