Letters

To the guy who cheated on me

A letter to the guy who cheated on me...

I am fascinated by your courage. Why did you cheated on me? Is my love not enough?

I gave everything to you! I offered my heart to you, but returned it broken into tiny little pieces that couldn't be glued back together.

Why did you did it? Love someone else while we are still in a relationship?

You could've just told me!

Maybe that way, we could've been able to save our relationship from its destruction. Maybe because of that, we would still be together until now.

You could've just said it right in my face while you were still becoming tired by my love.

Why did you let her ruined us?

Why did you let her ruined this beautiful world that's always been between the two of us?

Why did you let her in?

I screamed at you that 2 am in the morning when you answered my question if the texts I've read on your phone were true. I punched you hard in the face and kick you hard when you confirmed it with a silent nod.

I tried to physically hurt you, you let me punch you because it was out of guilt. Really? You're only feeling guilty the moment you threw it in my face?

I punched until my knuckles bleed. But it wasn't enough.

Hurting you physically will never be enough. Because the damaged you caused to my heart couldn't be fixed.

You gave me a forever, and then one day, you've decided to took it away. You changed your mind and decided to took that forever away and gave it to her instead.

You don't know how much you ruined me. How much you ruined my life. Because you were my life. You were my world.

I stopped living when I found out that you've been with this girl while I was completely drunk from your lies.

Why did you did that? When did you stopped loving me but instead of letting me go, you let me wrapped on your finger while you're completely in love with someone else?

You don't know how destroyed I was when I found out, when you confirmed it.

You had a chance to be honest with me, you had lots of chances but you let it happened. You could've just walked up to me on sunday morning, while the rain is pouring outside the house, and told me about it.

Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you ask me?

I would understand, you know. Even if it hurts, I would understand and let you go because I love you and I want you to be happy. Even if it that means letting you go.

What about our future? What about our future selves together, those plans about our marriage? Our plan when we have our kids? Our plans about traveling beautiful places together?

Ah, I get it. You chose to make those promises with her instead of me. Her whom you've never shared your secrets about someone's bad chose of outfit.

That someone whom you've never told about how bad it is to smoke. That someone whom you've never take into a fancy dinner. That girl whom you've never washed her clothes and socks, and even her underwear.

You didn't shared your secrets with her. You didn't shared the inside jokes of a name of someone we both hate. Because that was me.

It was me who've been there, since the very start.

I've known you all of my life. I know you like the back of my hand. I know that you're allergic to dust and shrimps. And that you don't eat odd looking foods because you don't have a strong stomach. I know that your favorite color is green, just like your eyes. I know that you'd rather fix your hair using your hand than combing it.

I know that you like it when I'm the one who will pick up the clothes you will wear for the day and I will be the one who will fix the tie on your neck. I know that you love it when we wear couple things.

But the moment you said that you love her more than me, I know that all of those wonderful memories, are gone.

Why did you chose her?

How could you make me believe I am your world when she's your universe?

How could you make me believe that I am your princess when all along, she is your queen?

How could you make me believe that I deserve many great things but when it comes to her, she deserves everything?

How could you not let me go when you don't love me anymore?

You're cruel. Selfish. Asshole. Jerk. Bastard. You're a cheater. A murderer.

But I love you.

Despite your flaws, I love you! Unconditionally.

How could I ever let you go?!

How could I ever accept the fact that you chose a stranger instead of me whom you've also known your whole life?

Why didn't you just told me about it? Why did you kept me?

I hope you're not happy with her. For she will look at you and all she'll see is the image of the girl whom you loved before her: me. She will see it written all over you.

She will see the shallow breaths you are taking every night and realize that it's not for you but it's for me, it's because he's guilty for hurting me. She will realize that you really loved me. And she'll regret being such a snake.

I hope she'll hurt you. I hope she'll shatter you into many pieces that you won't be able to put it together again. I hope she'll strangle you to death, just like what you did to me.

I hope she'll hurt you.