[Old] Never let go, Never Runaway (Oumasai)

Silky Heart

TW: Suicide and self-harm mentioning !!

I sat star-struck. My beloved Shuimai- I mean Saihara is coming to visit me?

I was excited, but then it hit me. Why did I out myself to the entire school? Maybe I should try again....

"Hey the nurse wants to know if you want something to drink?" My uncle said.

I nodded. "Yeah, can I get a Panta?" I asked.

"Sure." He said walking out of the room.

I laid back down. I looked at the cause of my close to death experience. 

My thin wrist had many scars on it. Some were old, some were new, and some were from the attempted sewwerslide.

I sighed and put my wrist down.

There was nothing special about the hospital. It was just your average hospital room.

it smelt nice.

silence.

I suddenly heard a knock on the door.

"Huh?" I asked. "Oh, come in."

Shuichi walked through the door.

"Hey, Sh-"

He had tears in his eyes. "DON'T EVER AND I REPEAT, EVER TRY THAT AGAIN, YOU HEAR ME?"

I quickly nodded. I never heard Shuimai yell like that before.

He pulled me into a tight hug.

"I love you," I said quietly, almost like a whisper.

"I *hic* Love you too, Kokichi."

Just then the door opened.

"Hey Kokichi, they only had off bran- OH." He walked out of the door.

I began to laugh. First time in years I showed genuine emotion.

**

2 weeks later:

I put my bags away in my closet. I'm finally home from the psych ward. I got sent there a day after Shuichi confessed. The time felt like it would never go. I wanted to get out so I could ask Shuichi where we should take our relationship.

I sighed.

I looked at my half-healed wrist. There were still scars, but I promised myself I would get better. For me and well everyone's sake.

I pulled out my phone. It had been two weeks since I last had it because the nurses took it away. There were endless YouTube notifications.

Shuichi <3

me: hey I'm finally out.

Shuichi: Oh that's great!

Shuichi: :)

me: can you come over later

Shuichi: ye sure :D

I put my phone down. I sighed.

things were getting better.

I was overjoyed.

**

"KOKICHI, YOUR FRIEND'S HERE!" Called my uncle.

"SEND HIM UP" I ryplyed.

I heard footsteps leading to my room.

 Shuichi opened the door.

"Shuimai!" I said before latching onto him. I was so excited to see him.

He chucked a bit. "Yeah."

He sat down next to me on the bed.

at that moment, it was quiet. Not a bad quiet, no it was just nice enjoying each other.

Finally, Shuichi spoke up. "So did you need to ask me something?"

I nodded.

I let in a big breath. "Uh well I- I was wondering... Where do you wanna take our relationship?" I asked with a hevey blush.

He just hugged me. "I think you know."

He loosened the hug. He put a hand on my burning face.

"Uh, Shuimai what are you-"

He kissed me.

After a while, he let go. I was left panting for breath.

I laid down. "I love you."

He lay by my side. "I love you too."

He cuddled my skinny body until I fell into a deep sleep.

It was heaven.

Message from me:

Suicide is never the answer. You'll get your happy ending if you try. But you can't try if you have no motivation. For me, to get the motivation to do anything, I like to go online and look at whatever I want to do! If I want to draw, I like to watch animatics on YouTube or look on Instagram! But again, Suicide isn't the answer. If you are being bullied, tell someone. Trust me, it works. It will make you feel better. If you are in a toxic relationship, try setting boundaries with the person but if that doesn't work try dropping them. Or if you're just feeling sad in general I like to find things that bring me comfort. Personally, I *love* to watch children's shows. It brings me so much comfort. I suggest you watch Bluey it's a really cute show on Disney Jr its about two dog sisters playing games with their parents and friends. It's really cute. But anywho I just want to let you know I care about you.

and that is the end

A/N: AHHH TYSM FOR READING THIS !!!! this book has meant a lot to me so yeah thanks for enjoying it

Song recommendation: Silky Heart (Toradora op 2)