Imani moves from North London to South west and joins year 13 in the borough's worst school. Where she meets troublesome Jamal, known to be influential in a block gang near her new estate. He can't help but become involved with her.
First day of school. I'm up way too early, flicking through my phone. It's 4am and I can hear my mum getting ready for work. She walks in quietly.
"Morning Rafaella," she whispers in the dark. She calls me that name after my father, Rafael, also how I got my middle name. She kisses me on the forehead lightly "I'll see you tonight. Call me if anything goes wrong." She says and leaves.
Even though I know full well I won't call her, even if something does go wrong at school today. I can't add to her pile of stress, I've always tried my best not to.
I hear the front door slam shut and I stretch and get out of bed. Pluto, my white Persian cat follows me.
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I have a shower and get changed. Putting my new uniform on. The T-shirt is light blue and the blazer, skirt and tie are navy with the school logo on.
Worst rated school in the borough, by ofsted. It was the only one I could get into this time of year, in the middle of a term.
I sit down at my desk, Pluto jumps up onto my lap and lays there sleepily. She's so clingy.
I do my makeup in the mirror, watching black mirror and drinking tea.
I have anxiety clutching at my throat. I can only hope that I'll be invisible here. I miss the gyaldem in North but I'm not sure if I can go up there for a long time. I just want to finish school and get a better life for me and my mum. Fuck the life we're living now.
We moved here last week, in a rush. Running away from her boyfriend, Steve. A proper geezer with an alcohol problem and an increasing temper.
He hit me. He hit me so we had to leave. He'd hit my mum before and I confronted her about it but she only got angry at me. But then he hit me, and she was instantly brought back down to earth.
One weekend when Steve was away, we took Pluto and our stuff and mum's van and fled, here. To the shittiest estate, the shittiest part of London, the shittiest school. And not an a level in sight.
My room is still yet to be unpacked and I plan to do all that after school. I need my room to be nice, at least. If the world out there is so morbid, I need this place to be beautiful and safe.
I take out some chicken from the freezer, for dinner. Pack my bag, brush my teeth, and put my blonde dyed hair up into a puffy bun, with my edges laid.
I kiss Pluto on the head. "I'll be back at four."
*** I went to school. Hardly eventful. I was introduced in tutor, and every other class. But aside from that, there was no help for me at all.
And now I'm walking home. I walk into the nearest corner shop to my estate. I grab milk and vegetables and pay for them.
