Chapter Thirteen: Decisions

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        We haven't told them yet. I feel kinda awkward about it. We sit in complete silence as the other boys chatter about...whatever. Suddenly, they look at us. I sneakily slip my hand through Mikey's.

        "What's up?" Frank asks. Neither of us answer.

        "Something is most definitely up." Ray says, setting his beer in the cup holder. I can feel the tears forming in my eyes and I force them back.

        "Mikey?" Gerard asks, looking at us questioningly. I break and keel over, sobbing into my knees. Mikey rubs my back. "Um...." Gerard looks at me. The tears are falling uncontrollably. I'm too young to be a mother. I wanted to travel with the band and kill dracs and play concerts and marry Mikey, but having kids...that's way in the future.

        "Will someone tell us what's goin on?" Frank asks. I sit back up, my hands pressed up against my mouth. Mikey leans into me.

        "You wanna tell them." I shake my head. "The woman said no. Can't tell you. Sorry." I change my mind.

        "Wait." I say, tears still streaming down my face. "I...If you tell so-someone I wi-will personally ki-kill you." I say, in between sobs. I look at Mikey and he nods encouragingly. "I'm...preg-pregnant." I say. The looks on the guys faces are priceless. "And I'm too young. I'm thinking about abortion and I just am too young. I wanted to travel with you guys and play in the band and marry Mikey and kill the dra-draculoids and....kids just wer-weren't in there y-yet." I say, sobbing.

        "Oh god Pierce." Ray says, covering his moth in shock.

        "Am I going to be an uncle?" Gerard asks.

        "I dunno." I look into my hands. "Everything is just so fucked up right now."

        "We're gonna be okay." Mikey says. Suddenly, I snap.

        "NO! No we are not! I am fucking pregnant! It was your idea! Your fucking shitty idea that got me fucking pregnant! Thanks to you!" I scream and stand up, running to MY room, slamming and locking the door. Someone walks to my door and knocks. "Fuck off Mikey. I want to be alone right now."

        "It's not Mikey." Gerard's voice.

        "Go away!"

        "Pierce, I need to tell you something."

        "What?"

        "Will you let me come in?" I sigh and walk to open the door. As soon as he's in I lock the door again. We sit on the edge of my bed. "Pierce. I wanted to tell you, I got my first girlfriend pregnant."

        "So."

        "I was fifteen." I stare at him.

        "Really?"

        "Yes. I was ashamed, but I stuck by her. Unfortunately, she didn't want that, and she left me instead. I never got to know that child. For that I'm kind of glad. I met Lyn-z and we have a beautiful baby girl and My life is wonderful."

        "Yeah? Well I just messed mine up."

        "Pierce," He puts his hand on my shoulder. "Do what you will with this child, but just remember, it's either going to bring you two together or break you apart."

        "Thanks."

        "Sarcasm."

        "No really?"

        "Again. Sarcasm."

        "Thanks Gee." I hang my head. "I just, I want to be a normal girl."

        "You're never going to be that." Gerard says, "You're in a band now, you can't be normal."

        "I just....I don't want to be a mom."

        "To tell you the truth, I was scared shitless to think that I was going to be a teen dad. But she left, and I didn't have to."

        "What does this have to do with MY problem."

        "Nothing, probably. I just wanted to talk to you." He sighs. "My brother really does love you, he would be broken if you left. I can see it, he has loved before, but never like this. A couple weeks, he proposed to you. Feel lucky to have him. Because I know he's never going to leave you. Just don't leave him."

        "I wasn't planning on it." I say, putting my head into my hands. "I just wanted to be alone for a minute."

        "Hey, I thought I bought you guys condoms."

        "You did." I say.

        "And, obviously, you DIDN'T use them.

        "Really, what was you're first clue?"

        "I'll leave you then." He stands and walks to the door. I sigh and lie back, staring at the ceiling. Abortion, Adoption, keeping it. Adoption. I sit up, I could find a person that wants a baby. Yes. That's what I would do.

        I wouldn't have to kill it.

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