chapter 2 - foundation day

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February 17, 2020 - 1/5 day of foundation day

I was jittery as fuck. I was so nervous, what if they weren't at school? I had checked the notebook which was written with reminders for what seemed like twenty thousand times in thirty minutes. I'd been sitting on the wooden sofa with my knees trembling, or my whole body for that matter. I felt like I was going to be late, when the time schedule actually says: 9:00 AM. (#anxietyfuckingsucks)

I checked it again, flipping on some random pages with my trembling hands. I felt that lump in my throat was about to burst any minute but I kept the grip. I sighed shakily, seeing the sun shine down as if it was afternoon, it always was making me nervous. I felt like I could cry any minute if the people think I was late, or I was the only one who came.

Anyway, I have to wait another thirty minutes and to kill my time, I'd turned in the television. Grandma and my cousin was away, and was having some sunshine rays moments, so I didn't bother. I was feeling anxious and I really wanted to go there just now. I'll be early five minutes and let's see what will happen in me. I would actually expect angry classmates than happy and chatty ones if I would come there later. I always look up at them like they weren't like me, but they're girls. Yeah, the main problem was they're girls and they could tell people shits about me and the foolish crowd would believe to it, that's my fear. (Context: I have a very controlling and manipulative mother, explains why I dislike girls.)

It has been ten minutes passed yet it felt like I was being dragged into a slow twenty minutes. I've never been so terribly sick all my life. I also have to wear a mask since the virus is starting to spread like a quickfire in China. I'm afraid to say it is also here in out country too. I've believed back then that 2020 doesn't exist, but here I am in a year where I fully know wouldn't exist. Yeah, it doesn't exist and we're in a trap. The true twenty-twenty is beyond years to come.

Anyway, it has been about twenty minutes so I decided to go earlier than late. I said goodbyes to my grandma and went on with my oversized and thick jacket although the sun was beaming its rays pretty much warmer now. I was wearing my mask, which I painted black a while ago since that batman logo looked obviously a shame to me.

As I was walking, I could feel my knee getting weak any minute. I felt like I was in a fucking desert, with all these jacket and mask, and it was so fucking hot but I was wearing it. I was also wearing my P.E. uniform beneath this, so it was so hard to think that I could actually survive with this jacket, especially in my looks. I looked like I've crossed thousands of desert, sweaty and sticky. I just had taken a bath though. My shoes and socks were trapping my feet, and it's irritating to say the least. Anyway, I came to the school safe and sound when I saw people, a lot of them, and smiled beneath the mask. Finally, my anxiety is... Chill... I guess.

I thought the sun would tell me I was late, but nevertheless, it did told me to hurry more often than not. It would always give me that anxiety, since the sun haven't shown up like that whenever I come down the school- chill, it's nine thirty, that's why! I quickly shoved my way through the senior high schoolers and made my way to our section's line. I sighed in relief, taking my mask off. I really didn't want to roll up the sleeve of my jacket, but it was so hot, and since I was feeling fine now, I did it anyway. Now that I had pulled the sleeves up, I could feel the cold air hitting my skin. The hell? If I pull this down it will be hot for me, if I pull this up, it will be so cold. Probably because of my sweat. I sighed once again, sniffing the fresh air -- which I inspect was filled with lots of germs, especially COVID? Is it? Jesus, Ronnie, stop.

A-Anyway, I was with my two friends. They looked good and nice, while I looked sweaty and dumb with this thick and oversized jacket I was wearing, and with the mask and my hair not tied properly at all.

I began to take my jacket off, sighing, "I thought I was late!"

Sophia stared at me as she puckered her lips together, attempting to pout, "No you're not,"

I shrugged, "But I seriously did thought I was, and I was freaking jittery all over thinking y'all won't actually come over this day. I know, that's hilarious." I chuckled lightly.

Czarina was wearing her small bag and looked at me, "What will you guys do later?" She asked. Sophia shrugged. I shrugged as well. What am I going to do? Right, my tickets are useless since I don't like going out anyway. I'd rather read a book from Wattpad than to ride an octopus that might even give me a stiff neck again! Just saying the truth. Anyway, maybe I would change my mind about riding and will just sell my tickets out just to buy some foods. I badly wanted to eat right now.

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