3...2...1...ACTION!

Chapter XVI: Love you...

I slowly slipped my body beside hers, and I couldn't tell if she sobered up but kept on acting drunk or if she's still under the influence, but I knew whatever it was I couldn't resist being as close to her as I was during the dinner party at her place. We laid there looking at each other's eyes, unable to move. I didn't even notice how close our bodies were. I was too busy studying her face, her beautiful soft lips wondering how they taste. Her eyes looked more beautiful up close and I could see now that her iris was surrounded by a thick black pigment that complimented the darkness of her eyes. Her black hair was now all messy but I had the urge to run my fingers into it. It looked so soft and fluffy. She reminded me of a cat and the thought of her with tiny cat ears appeared in my head as I started smiling to myself. "What's so funny?" she asked, smiling back at me with an unfamiliar glow in her eyes. It was the first time that I noticed but she had dimples, I lifted my hand up to meet her face and poked a finger in one of her dimples and laughed to myself. She laughed with me wrapping an arm around my waist. "I just thought of how cute you would look if you had cat ears on." I responded to her question and she let out a laugh. "I mean you do have the personality of a cat." I explained myself to her, she slowly let go of my waist to cup my face with her own hands, and said. "You know while we are on this subject, you have the personality of a cat too... but an orange cat." I laughed at how silly she and I were being. It felt a lot like speaking to a childhood friend. Like we were just kids sharing a bed and at that moment I realised that I missed out on so many things because of my father.

The thought of him ruined my mood and as much as I tried not to think of it, I remembered his voice, his touch, his glare. All the details that terrorised me when I was just a kid, all the memories came flooding back. Elinor's voice brought me back to reality, but I couldn't hear what she was saying. Her lips were moving and I could hear her voice, but I was unable to compose correct sentences or words from what she was saying. "Eli..." I managed to whisper, but then my vision became blurry as tears filled up my eyes. I felt disgusting, I hated myself for ruining the moment, her happiness, her mood. I sat up quickly and she followed, my breathing became heavier so I closed my eyes, counted to ten... "one... two... three..." When I opened my eyes again I heard a ring in my ear and I could hear her words properly once it passed. "Jenny!" she protested, her voice shaky, she was worried about what had just happened to me. "It was nothing, not the first time this had ever happened to me." I was lucky it passed so quickly, otherwise it could have taken up to an hour if I was alone. "What was that about?" she asked and I could see concern in her eyes and the tears I tried so hard to pull back came out, but I wasn't sobbing, I wasn't making a single facial expression, tears only came out of my eyes and there was nothing I could do to stop them. Elinor cupped my face gently in her hands as she softly whipped away my tears only for my cheeks to get soaked once again with new ones. "I have... I have PTSD, Eli. My father... He-" she cut me off pulling me into a sentimental hug stroking my hair slowly and pulling me on top of her as we laid down. I rested my head on her chest listening to her steady heart beat as she hummed a song to me. I didn't pay much attention to the song itself but focused on her voice instead. I felt comfort being in her arms, and at this point, as I closed my eyes ready to drift off to sleep, I realised I was now in love with Elinor Baldwin.