Love me 'Til it Hurts

Chapter 19 - I Think We're Alone Now.

An Hour Later...
Rayne Saunders...

Cal had knocked on my bedroom door in the early hours of the morning to tell me that he was heading back to Jensen and Juliette's, that the latter had called and asked him to go back. He wasn't back this morning when I got up. It's not really all that surprising to be honest - he and Juliette have grown so close; it is clear to everyone that they have a connection. I just hope that my friend doesn't get hurt. And I hope that Juliette, who is more like a sister to me, doesn't get hurt either.

Jeremy being back has definitely thrown a spanner in the works, for want of a better term; I have worked so damn hard to try and get her to see that there is life without him. I see the way she and Jeremy look at one another. I see the connection between them flaring back to life and there isn't a damn thing I can do to stop it from happening.

Like I said to Jeremy the night he returned - I don't hate him. I never hated him. I am just not thrilled at the way he handled the situation with my friend all those years ago. I mean I know that he did the right thing in walking away - there was never going to be a good outcome if he stayed. Even Juliette knew that. That girl is far more perceptive than anyone gives her damn credit for. No, what really angered not just Juliette, but me was the fact that he just disappeared - no talking, no warning that he was leaving, he just disappeared with the moon and stars as the sun came up.

Pulling my little black Mustang into the driveway at the side of the Ackles property and killed the engine just as my phone pinged with a text, 'hey chicka, I have taken Jules to my new place to show her around. Gonna make a day of it since I picked up the keys and it is officially mine. Will let you know if we will be back in time for dinner, enjoy your day with Mr. Jay. Love ya C 😉😊'

'I expect a tour of this new place of yours you know? Enjoy your day too, don't do anything that I wouldn't do 😉 love ya R 😊'

Slipping my phone into my bag, I climbed out of the car and made my way to the front door. A whole day with Jensen. Maybe Jeremy could make himself scarce and finally Jensen and I could fully be alone. We haven't had the opportunity to spend some real quality time together since I have been back, and I want that more than anything.

Jensen Ackles.

My first true love. The first boy I ever had sex with. The first boy I said I love you to. Our connection to one another had been so strong for a while - I believed that I could have told you what he was thinking at all times but then his folks died, and he was thrust into the role of care-giver to his younger sister and he had all this responsibility of paying a mortgage and providing all the things that Juliette needed. I know that it was something that he didn't mind doing because their parents had raised them to know that family is everything.

Deep down I knew that he was going to end things before even he knew, I think. The thing about Jensen is that he has this basic driving force to take care of people - if he sees someone struggling and he can help, he will, no questions asked and no sense of entitlement for compensation. It was one of the things that I loved the most about him.

So, when he was suddenly a parental figure to a teenager, there was no way in Hell that he was going to ask me to shoulder that burden with him. I mean, I would have in a heartbeat. Not just because it was Jensen but because it was Juliette and I had already formed a close friendship with the girl.

At first, he tried to be a dick about it - claiming that I was nothing more than a means to an end for him. That all he wanted was sex and to hang with his buddies, but I called him on his bullshit. Told him in no uncertain terms that I deserved better than to be lied to and that was when he cracked and confessed everything. I listened to his reasoning, and I even agreed to his request to never let Juliette know the truth as to why we split up. The man even suggested that we stick to the initial story he tried to feed me so, even to this day, Juliette believed that Jensen dumped me because he simply wasn't ready to settle down.